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And it gets better...

attempting_to_maintain_composure's picture

GUBM pulled SD out of school, get this, THREE WEEKS AGO. And SD has been lying to him ALL THIS TIME. GUBM's reason for not telling him? "I wanted to make sure all my affairs were in order and that all my i's were dotted and my t's crossed." REALLY?! How about this is HER FATHER, the person who is 50% responsible for her, 100% FINANCIALLY responsible for her because you can't be buggered to get a job, and you let her, nay, tell her to LIE to him for a month about how she's having so much fun at school, making so many friends, and all that delusional crap??

What a couple of lunatics! SO is done with both of them. He's over the idea of SD moving in with us - he doesn't want her here. And I don't blame him one bit. She used him to get an Xbox for Christmas, dropped him like a bad habit because he didn't come whisk her away to PGH, and has been lying and manipulating ever since (actually, she's been manipulating him since long before I came around).

He kept apologizing to me for yelling over the phone, but, he's fed up right now, I said it's better to get it out than keep it in because keeping it in will hurt him in the long run (the anger, that is). He also apologized for saying that he doesn't want her living here and I said "Well, I can't really blame you. I wouldn't want to live with someone who treated me the way she treats you, and I don't, because I moved out of my family's house as soon as I possibly could".

He's going to stop CS payments (no formal order) and put them all into a bank account. If any legal actions come of this, his dad will help with the lawyer and he'll have all the back support sitting in an account to pay out if need be. If no legal actions come of this, whatever, the CS will still go into the account every month so that if, one day, SD pulls her head out of her backside long enough to realize how badly she fucked up, she might have a nice college fund. If not? Oh well, SO will have himself a nice savings account. I'll support his plan. It's his kid after all, and if he wants nothing more to do with her, then, good.

I'm so over their bullshit. I would have killed, literally, to have had my father around when I was her age, but, sadly, my father died. And what does she do, ungrateful brat that she is? Uses him, manipulates him, chews him up, spits him out and lies to him. Without so much as a little smidgen of guilt.

ETA: It pisses me off that GUBM and GUBM's mom gave SD shit over wanting to move out here to PGH because then she would be "running away from her problems", but, the reason GUBM pulled her out of school? She was "miserable". Yea, because YOU ripped her out of her old school and forced her to move where she didn't want to move. So, way to reinforce that it really IS OK to run away from your problems.

I am also having a hard time moving past the anger associated with SD lying to SO this entire time. That kid spent all of 25 and a half days in her last school before GUBM took her out of the school. She was enrolled for barely a month, and, wasn't even in school the entire time because she started there the week before Christmas break. So, SD has been lying to SO for weeks about being in school and all that jazz. Unbelievable. Simply unbelievable.

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attempting_to_maintain_composure's picture

I'm honestly surprised, but, I fully support his move to cease sending CS. They don't deserve SO's financial support. It's like he told me last night, they're living in their own fantasy world, and, that's fine, they can continue to do so. But, they will continue to do so without dragging him into it. If they feel like ever coming back to the real world then maybe, MAYBE, they can have him back in their lives again. He said "I'm not financing crazy and stupid to live in a fantasy bubble of lunacy."

Personally, I'm kind of torn either way on whether I want SD to pull her head out of her ass and grow the hell up or not. With how much she has been PAS'd (SO and I went through a checklist last night and he realized how severe it really is), he's not sure he wants her around since it's unfixable when you have an obsessive alienator like GUBM. But, hey, silver lining, if SD doesn't pull her head outta her backside in the next 5 years, we'll havea nice little account with enough money to take a few sick ass trips Biggrin

attempting_to_maintain_composure's picture

Oh, SD is 13. She'll be 14 at the end of the year.

We've long had a problem with SD lying to SO, but, SO thought he nipped that problem this summer. Of course, he didn't anticipate SD being as PAS'd as she really is, either, so, it all came as a huge shock and blow to him.

GUBM and SD have totally taken SO for granted, treating him like the bank of SO for the last 13 years. So, I can guarantee that they will miss that extra $600 a month - whether it really impacts them or not, who knows, because they are leeches. They leech off of GUBM's entire family, her mom, her dad (who may or may not have brain cancer, I'm not sure I trust that anymore because, big surprise, SD and GUBM lied about spending Christmas with him, so, I don't know that I trust he has brain cancer). Because of the people who are willing to let her leech, SO isn't sure whether GUBM would actually take him to court or not. She might fear losing SD, which, at this point, we don't really want her living here, so, he's fine with her not dragging him to court, but, he'll be prepared if she does.