you have taken the only thing from her that she had over you and that is she is the mother of daughter and now ya'll have one together. We are trying to get pregnant and I fear BM will be even worse than she is now already because that is the only thing she has with my H that no one else has and that is a child. I can hear it now..."SS better not suffer because of this new baby" she has already told SS that if your Dad and Step G have a baby that will not be your real baby brother or sister because it is not the same mama! Your BM just did not like the fact that your H was tending to ya'lls baby and could not come to her beck and call!

My DH was the guy who said..."I will never get married again", let alone have more kids! Then I came along, and screwed up everything, (ha-ha.), well for BM anyways! I was divorced myself, and on the same page of never doing that all again. But then you fall in love, and everything is like brand new again. Life with BM becomes a distant memory....and that's where the freak outs really begin. All the things he never thought he would do, feel, or want again, HE WANTS very much with you. And BM can't stand that, and for me to step in and turn him around like that, almost makes it "mean" more, than that first time around. BM becomes his "dress rehersal"..for the real thing. I almost don't blame her for freaking,....tee-hee. :)"~waiting on the world to change~"

Our 2 year old son is absolutly beautiful, and very loved!"~waiting on the world to change~"

BM's tend to freak out a bit when the SM's have a baby with the Dh's. Our BM was particularly nasty after our 1st son was born...... Good luck with that.

ours went above and beyond anything I could have ever imagined. When she got wind of the wedding she went ballistic and bad mouthed him to me, the kids, anyone who would listen. Then she had the , "fine, don't say I did not warn you additude", and expected me to do everything for "her" kids, now that I was supposed to be their " 2d mom" Then I got preggers, and BM went insane (more than usual). She started telling the skids that the baby must be an "accident", that after the baby comes they will be ignored, BM wrote very harassing e-mails to me personally, attaking my parenting skills (this woman knows nothing about me, or how I do things) even went as far as badmouthing my bio kids in her stupid tyraids. Then came the worst, a couple of months before our son was to be born she left a voice mail on my cell phone, stating "I hope your baby dies".....yeah, it went that bad! She also admitted in an e-mail to me that she was trying to stress me on purpose, because " stress is bad for the baby." I was totally sickened by her! We mentioned all this when we went to court, but besides a couple of snide comments to her from the judge, nothing was really done about the harassment. That is why 6 months after our son was born, I made up my mind, to some thing we were already thinking about, and that was to move away. I wanted to come back to my home town any way, but after dealing with that.... I was more than ready. I know my case is extream, but stuff like this happens to some degree or another. The question is, how much are we supposed to take???"~waiting on the world to change~"

You know that your BM is jealous of you ! Jealous of your marriage, your everything that has to do with your hubby!! Green with envy - she may want some green eggs and ham to go along with that jealousy. HA !!

Good for you, now you don't have to deal with her, I know that you just wanted to talk for the benefit of your step, but she can't see beyond her own nose.

When DH and I got pregnant with our first, I did it on purpose to replace SD - how absurb !! I had to find the bigger person in me, (i hate always being the bigger person) to deal with all of that.

Girl, please - you rock !!

Stepwitch
Thank you Disney for portraying a positive image on all stepmothers!!!!

I'm not pregant yet!! but I do fear what BM will be like when we announce that I'm pregant. All hell will break loose I'm sure. But as many people have told me we need to live life and do whats right for us even if other people don't like it or can't handle it.
BM has already told DH why can't he be with someone that already has children or at least doesn't want any. She makes it sound like the skids won't like it not that she has an issue with it. Mind you BM has no father he left her before she could remember, her mother re-married to other man (who also left without a trace) she had another daughter with (yes that's right BM has a half sister as well that she calls her full sister)but still has the nerve to say to DH that if we were to have a child it wouldn't be a brother or sister to the skids, our child will be a no body to them.
What you have said are BM's issues not yours, so try not to over analyse it, you have a new arrival to focus your atttention on.
My advise would be to try and avoid contact with her leave it to DH.

Stay strong, you'll get through it.

When DH and I decided to get married, a few people we knew jokingly asked us when we were having a baby. We each came with two kids to the marriage. My response was usually, "between us we have four kids, two dogs and two cats, do we really need anymore??"
I was with mil and few others before the wedding and somehow the subject was brought up and mil about blew up. She is / was so worried that we would want a child together. Now dh had a vasectomy before I came along, so this is not an option anyway, which mil also reminds me about. Mil also likes to bring up the fact that bm is the "kid's mom" and also likes to glorify her heritage. I am not really sure why.

Sometimes I get the feeling that she is trying to make sure I know that I am on outsider to her and her family or something and that the prior wife was the preferred one and that since bm is the "kid's mom" that she is the only real family. Maybe I am just being paranoid.

Who knows...