So OneLife's blog got me thinking. Yes there are the 5 stages of grief, honestly I think I finished most of those before I hit him with the dovorce news, it was like I KNEW it had to happen.  I went through the crying, the denial that it had to, then it was kind of just acceptance, and besides the fact STBX has been a pain in the a$$.  I've processed the grief for the divorce.

I am still however grieving for the girls, and I think that's going to take a LOT longer than grieving the divorce...

So it's been a bit, I've been in Indiana on a business trip, currently in 5 inches of snow and LOVING it (coworker not so much.  BUt I'm calling it Karma since he's been a d***.)

I officially got tax return money TODAY.  The lawyer has been paid, he's doing one more review of the papers, then we sign and we're done (assuming STBX doens't pull any s***, which let's be real... He probs will... BUT, I have proof of the infidelity, so I'd win in court.  I'll ahve the divorce either way).  I also recoupped the money STBX owed me from last month BEFORE I sent him anything.  SO yay me.

I had therapy last week... Which honestly went well.  We talked, she helped some of my mental stability.  We established that from talking to him and me.  That he loves control, which he perceives as actual love.  Which doesn't line up with my non-insane perception of love.  She asked if I felt things had improved at all, and I said no, so we chatted about that for a while.  I expressed several times that I didn't get why I still cared at all after all the s*** we'd been through because of him, she finally said that I definitely did know and we both know it's the girls.

So as many of you know. Separated from H. He had an affair, is crazy, got engaged to the b*** he had an affair with, I (stupidly) gave him anoother chance, he continued to lie, I moved out, we did counseling, he's still a jacka$$, and now that brings us to last night.