DH and I were talking about the kids this morning. We were talking about how we would handle after-highschool age kids. How long they would be allowed to live in our house, they absolutely must have a job - you know, stuff like that. The oldest is 14 and the youngest are 9, so we have a ways to go still. We are doing our best to teach them how to live on their own. They are required to do chores, and I'll be teaching Spongebob (BS14) and Sheldon (SS13) how to cook after the first of the year. Also, I think they'll be doing their own laundry after the first of the year also.

We know that eventually they'll have to go out into the world alone. Even though we teach them all that we can, I'm scared to death. It's the little things that worry me so much. KittyCat (SD9) likes to run in parking lots. I cant tell you how many times we've had to fuss at her for that. Yes, yes, I know she's only 9 and has plenty of time to learn, but in our talk, we see her having a place of her own, running out in front of traffic, and well . . . splat. Worse, I'm worried that she will never want a place of her own. She'll just go and live with her mommy the rest of her life.

With Starr (BD9), she loses track of everything she has. She could be given a $1,000 pair of earrings and she would lose them by the end of the week. I picture her always losing car and house keys, forgetting to pay the rent, etc. She's a very smart girl, but she lacks in the common sense department sometimes. She is also so dependent on the company of other people, that I think when she does finally live on her own, she'll sit alone in an apartment, doing nothing but eating and watching TV because no one else is there to help guide her.

Sheldon (SS13) likes to keep everything he has ever owned and he doesn't like to share. If he sees an old used sparkplug or shiny bottlecap, they end up hoarded away in his bedroom somewhere. I'm seeing him as one of those people on "Hoarders". Oh, the horror!!!

Spongebob (BS14). OMG!! Where to start?? He is a know-it-all and is never wrong. God help you if you disagree with something he absolutely knows is fact. I see him running people off because of his stubborness. Well, I see Spongebob ending up just like my ex-husband, because is a lot like him, and that scares me more than anything else.

I know I turned out fine. My husband is very fine (heehee). However, we have our exes as examples as to why I'm so afraid of their future. My Ex doesn't do anything for himself. He might do some laundry and cook an occasional microwave meal, but as far as housework, he does nothing. His house is rotting around his head and is soon to be auctioned off by the bank because he hasn't made a housepayment in almost a year. Trees that fell in a freak windstorm 18 months ago, and another tree that fell in an ice storm a year ago are still laying in his backyard. I don't want my kids being like that!!!

The Wookie lives with her brother next door to their mother. Mommy pays for the house, mommy fixes their meals. The Wookie and her brother are both almost 50 years old!!!! I'm so afraid of KittyCat wanting to take the easy way out and doing what her mother did.

How do some of you with older kids handle these feelings?