Last evening I sat Dh down and we read every single posting on my topic. Thank you ladies.

Some said exactly what he felt...just biding my time until this is all settled. Some exactly how I felt....hurt not stood up for.

We had a very good talk about everything. He understands now how I felt when he let her go on and on about me and he didn't do anything. He put it in perspective and said his father would never allow that to happen to his mom. He was so sorry and agreed to set up new parameters for us and his ex wife.

She has agreed to met with him, her father and his father next week to see what his proposal is for spousal, child support and custody. If they agree they will not go to court...my guess they will but I will remain optimistic. My DH's father is a big supporter of mine and has no use for her (unlike MIL) so I know he will not allow her to bad mouth me in his presence.

Once this all finalized...Dh is hoping sooner rather than later then he will put the wheels in motion and set up the new guidelines.

We have decided that she will not be able to contact our home any longer..emails and his cell only. For one she takes too much time away from our family on these calls and two she can't be trusted (evident yesterday when she emailed him and said these harrassing phone calls have to stop....who called who!!!!!).

I hope we are on the way to recovering. We talked about tryng to find ways to cope with her when she starts again and she will. So we will seek our own counselling for this.

He also admitted he doesn't know how to handle her. He gets nervous and unsure of himself and she is constantly tripping over his words. So for this he is seeking counselling.

Sounds like we will be in couselling so much ...no time to enjoy the good stuff. Oh it will all work out in the end.

Thank you for all of you who gave us new presepectives and your support. My Dh knows how valaubke this site is for us and appreciates that I can share my woes and triumphs with you all.

Enjoy the day