She used the wrong address in the summons
Whoever said this may be what happened was right! 
We've been waiting almost 3 weeks to get served with the paperwork BM's attorney filed for the motion. Her attorney sent a "courtesy" copy to DH's attorney today .. and sure enough, an address DH hasn't lived at in over 3 years was used.
The summons says he has 30 days to respond from the date of service .. like 10 days from now. We still haven't been served, so it seems that this could go on a while. The summons expires in 60 days.
Just curious what others have done in this situation?
DH started the change order process trying to give BM weekend time by adjusting his own time to be 3 days per week (instead of 2) to compensate for the lost 2 days he'd be giving BM (every third weekend). Now that she's basically snubbing him and trying to go to court, I'm thinking DH should just drag his feet as long as he can .. he's got no reason to rush it at this point.
By "10 days from now", I
By "10 days from now", I meant that would be 30 days from the date it was filed; not served.
Be careful. We nailed my
Be careful. We nailed my SS's SpermIdiot when he refused delivery and eventually physically ran from the Constable that was serving him with a CS modification summons.
We ended up getting a CS mod without any input or participation from the SpermIdiot and his CS went up by nearly 600%. We also got payroll withholding invoked. When he got his first $0.00 paycheck he just about stroked out. He filed an emergency relief request that took several months to get a court date on. The relief hearing got the CS reduced from ~600% of the previouse to ~300% of the previous CS amount but because of hsi delay tactics the 600% order was held to our original file date and he had to pay the 300% order plus over a year of arrears on the 600% order.
I know that you are not refusing delivery of the summons or otherwise refusing to engage but do not put it past BM to try to blame your side for any delays.
Make sure not to miss a court date.
Good luck.
Yes, we're keeping a close
Yes, we're keeping a close eye on the court website to catch any dates that may be scheduled. We have no intention of missing a court date, but DH's attorney will absolutely show up to argue we never received a summons and ask for any delay/postponement she can get.
He hasn't actually talked to his attorney yet .. she's in court all day. The paralegal sent over the summons and we've just been kinda brainstorming on it ourselves.
BM refers to DH as "Father"
BM refers to DH as "Father" throughout the order; and refers to herself as "Wife". Ha!
All of our CO related records
All of our CO related records from the court reference "In the marriage of". They were never married.
I agree with what rags
I agree with what rags said.
If you go before a judge, you need to think about what can be said that will really emphasize to them how this benefits the kids. They'll get more stability, more equal time with BOTH parents, etc.
I know this is sort of ot but maybe it's time to get a mediator involved. Maybe that'd help communications between dh and bm. If you can't afford one, perhaps your courthouse has other options.
We've tried mediation. It
We've tried mediation. It didn't work. DH finally got her to agree to sit down with him and their attorneys. In a meeting that last just over 2 hours, they hashed out the bulk of the issues at hand (small lingering ones like where kids will play sports were tabled for the time being).
DH's attorney left that meeting and proceeded to draft up the agreed upon change order.
When DH sent it to her, she informed him that she never agreed to any of that and that she was filing directly with the court. She said that she'd rather let a judge decide.
I'm sure a judge may order mediation before making any decisions, so we'll see if we can get her back to a settlement point. Regardless, DH's attorney will be prepared to argue in court even if she's asking for a delay/postponement (just in case it isn't granted).
Oh we'll definitely run it
Oh we'll definitely run it all by the attorney.
I see no reason to rush to respond though, especially considering no court date has been set.
The file she sent our attorney is a Word document .. I would think one could argue that without the actual summons, there was no confirmation that the draft we received represented the final version filed with the courts.
Even if we consider the email a service, our 30 day clock starts today