xmas candles
Forums:
HI my partner makes candels as little hobby just a few here and there, Is it strange that he wants to make one with his 11 year old son in our kitchen for his ex wife ? or should i leave that alone and let them do there thing ?
i just found it strange but have not said anything yet. he wants him to make one for xmas gift from the little of course.. i just thought i would ask here before opening my mouth.
It’s his job as a BF..Parent
To get his DS a gift for BM. At least this is a activity they can do together. This is the joys of SLife
You need to see this as two
You need to see this as two separate things.
1. A father helping a son and bonding over a project.
2. A boy making a present for his mom.
And a parent teaching their
And a parent teaching their kid to give as well as receive.
Lets hope the kid makes something for SM, too.
Not a hill to die on in my
Not a hill to die on in my opinion.
Not unusual or wrong either.
Pretty inoccuous. He is working with his young child to make a gift for the kid's mom. Be wary of ascribing meaning to this beyond what it is. Now, if there are other influencing factors, it may be something that is not acceptable for you. In that case, enforce your boundaries. Only you have the rest of the story.
As for candles, those things breed like rabbits. I have been fighting a valiant but losing battle against the candle invasion for more than 30 years. I am absolutely dying on the defense against candle hill. IN sight right now there are 4 and there are at least another 80 lying in ambush throuout our home.
no no other factors really,,
no no other factors really,,,i dont think ill help i will sit it out and do something else
I think its good
Not something to worry about.
Things to worry about: your partner jumps through hoops, and caters to BM all the time for everything, and buys her gifts from himself.
never ever happens thank you
never ever happens
thank you
Unless there are other
Unless there are other boundary issues with BM, this may not be something to stress over. If your DH likes to make candles anyway, he probably looks forward to doing it with the kid. Maybe making it "for mom" is his way to get the kid to engage in his hobby with him. This is also probably the easiest and cheapest way to check "get present for kid to give BM" off his list since he makes them anyway. Prople who do crafts are always looking for a way to make their creations useful. It justifies their craft. I think this, in and of itself, does not signify any boundary issues with your DH and BM.
Sounds better than going out
Sounds better than going out and spending money.
It is an age appropriate gift
It is an age appropriate gift and sweet that it will be homemade.
What I would consider inappropriate is your husband spending more than $30 on a gift that he chooses (rather than his son).
Maybe suggest that they could make some for Grandparents, Aunts or teachers at the same time to dilute the ikiness that you might feel.