My husband and I have been married 8+ years. He has 3 children from a previous marriage and I have 2. His oldest daughter (just turned 20) had a child yesterday. His whole family is over the moon. I am struggling with the whole situation. Let me explain. She lived with us for her 4 years in high school. Many struggles there including revolving door boyfriends, promiscuity (when she was with us and on trips to her mothers in MI), etc. 3 weeks before she graduated hs in 2015, she and her boyfriend packed up her stuff and moved out of our house. For the better part of the last year and a half, she has completely cut off all communication w/ me and my biological children. She would talk to her dad, call her younger brother (who still lives in our house - he is now 13) bring her brother presents on his bday/christmas - but never included me or my two kids. Last spring she and her boyfriend were evicted from their apartment (shared w/ 2 other people) and then in June revealed she was pregnant (on the night of her sisters high school graduation). She has been living with the boyfriends mom in a swanky apartment since. She has worked a part time hourly job, her boyfriend also has a part time hourly job, neither have medical insurance or benefits (she is still on my husbands and her mothers insurance so has paid nothing for this pregnancy). About 4 months ago, she reached out through my husband to say she wanted to "make amends" to me and my kids. My husband and I had a conversation about it and I agreed to open the lines of communication. She and I had a discussion where I told her it was going to be a process of rebuilding trust and togetherness but we'd work on it. That is a bit of the back story to help explain my current struggle. The baby was born yesterday after 3 days in the hospital. Her mother has been there all week and has has the youngest son (the 13 yr old living with us) with her. My husband has been in constant contact w/ his ex who has been running the whole show at the hospital - demanding this and that. The night before, my stepson came home and I was led to believe that he was home from his holiday time w/ his mother. The baby was born around 530am via c-section and pictures were immediately flooding FB and my husbands phone - however, none of this was shared with me. He told me that she had been taken into emergency c-section at 530 and everything seemed fine. A bit later, my stepson runs up to our room and says "aren't the pictures of the baby cute?". I hadn't see any! I head down and ask my husband who then proceeds to show me. When asked why he hadn't mentioned them before he got up (he'd already had them since 530) his response was "I didn't think about it". WHAT?? I told him I felt like an outsider looking in and he brushed it off. A bit later I asked what the plan was to go see the grandbaby and he said "I thought we'd go up in an hour or so". Mind you, my two children weren't getting back from their dads for another 4 hrs. I said "what about the other kids?" his response? "why would that matter?" I said "because they're family??!!". His excuse? my stepson's mother was picking him up (my husband had known that the night before but didn't inform me) and he was thinking that just he and I would go. I exploded! I am pretty even tempered (probably too much so that I let myself get walked over) but I was mad. His focus has been so much on his "other family" with his ex-wife that he hasn't included me in any of this. Then my kids get back from their dads, my husband and I are in heated discussions so they are tiptoeing around us. He tells them "the baby was born" and they both said "that's good" (no fireworks from them - seriously why should they given that they have been on the outside of her life for a year and a half) but that sent my husband into a fury. I am so angry and let down by it all. He is so focused on his daughter and her new baby with no thought about the family he has under his roof!! I feel hurt and betrayed - like I am on the outside looking in...