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I'm glad I'm not alone!

Step-Monkey.'s picture

Submitted by Step-Monkey. on Thu, 01/13/2011 - 11:41am

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Teenage Stepchildren

I'm new to this site. I've spent some time reading other people's comments and, as wierd as it sounds, I am so happy to find a place where I can talk w/ people who understand! I have a SD19 that lives w/ her Dad & I. She's only lived w/ us for 5 years. The previous 6 years were spent living w/ her mom who is bi-polar (diagnosed) and is a pathological liar! I am thankful that she hasn't gotten pregnant or gotten involved in drugs/alcohol but she lies constantly! I see many comments on here from other people w/ the same issue. She's 19, in college, and we just had to sit her down last night and have a conversation about lying AGAIN (for the umpteenth time!) my husband is constantly apologizing to me that she makes our life so hard which makes me feel horrible that he feels that way. I do love him but she is a constant strain on our relationship. 90% of our fights are about her! I do believe thy when she's 25, we'll be great friends - I'm just nut sure if I'll make it that long??

007Lostit's picture

Submitted by 007Lostit on Thu, 01/13/2011 - 11:48am

Well you are certainly more optimistic than I am about where my SD17 and I will be five or seven years down the road. lol But that is a good thing. Kudos to you.

My SD lies all the time too. Don't expect it to stop. My DH is always apologizing to me also, and that is what 98% of our fights are about as well...not the lying just the SD in general...well maybe it is the lying she does if it has to do with her ...lol...ok nevermind. I am in one strange mood today.

Welcome. Smile These ladies are great, they make me laugh and smile and give me perspective.

It is not all flowers and daisies here, and the spectrum of experience with skids varies greatly, but I think it is a good mix.

loverNOTfighter's picture

Submitted by loverNOTfighter on Tue, 01/18/2011 - 5:01pm

I just found this website too. I have been reading most of the day. I feel so much better knowing I am not alone and that the anger I feel is not abnormal. My husband is an OK guy. He is a professional and at least we don't have serious money struggles. I cannot imagine how much worse it would be if we did.

His 2o year old daughter lives with us. I have been through the awful teen years with her. The thing is, I am so sick of hearing the excuse being that she was a teen and that she still struggles with mom and dad not being together. It has been 5 years now. All right all ready. I rarely confront/confronted. He offered excuses before I had to ask for apologies for the most part. I keep hanging on because I am hopeful that we will beon our own some day and things will be better. But I know he will not be different. The lack of support and fixing things has taken its toll. I think to the point of where my misery was such that I couldn't hide it and he may have gone to another woman. I cannot bear to think about THAT issue.

Anyway, so glad to be a part of this.

ddakan's picture

Submitted by ddakan on Wed, 01/19/2011 - 10:52am

Yep, when the skid is around....its constant STRESSSSSSSS.

When they leave.....ahhhh feels good.

To be understood is validating. It makes this insanity make sense.