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SS 17 - Lying, Stealing, ETC

bwhit72's picture

Defiant SS17 year old that lies, steals, etc. For over 5 years now I've been involved, married for almost 2 and he never learns a lesson or changes his behavior. He has stolen from us repeatedly and we have installed cameras, just last night 10.00 disappeared from the table and he is the one on camera taking it...again. He is teaching our younger children misguided behavior and I am beyond over dealing with him. This behavior along with the fact that he is very disrespectful to me and tries to break us up constantly is becoming more than overwhelming. Last year he called the police and told them I had beat him before school and shoved his head into a wall. I now make him go to his grannys house when his dad is away and can't be there with him. Luckily we have cameras for backup and it was proven that he lied about all of that. I'm ready to RUN!

bwhit72's picture

he feels stuck between the two. I am NOT asking him to choose me over him just do something. Obviously years in, grounding doesnt work. What other options are there at this point? I asked him to let him go live with his nanny, who OFFERED...we didn't use her as an out of any means but she said she would let him stay there until he is 18 in 8 months.

SteppedOut's picture

So, this has been going on for YEARS with no resolve. Years. Nothing has changed.

You have 2 choices:

1. Accept this poor behavior.

2. Leave.

Nothing changes if nothing changes. 

 

Rags's picture

Did anyone sit him down, review the footage with him, then call the police?

If not, why not?

bwhit72's picture

not yet. We are at work, I looked at the camera this morning once I realized I never picked up the money and it was gone. So, he is at school and we are not home. 

 

Kelly_thestepmum_in20s's picture

Sad that ss has this bad habit in him. Hopefully, he will drop this habit. 

I can relate to this, when I met my DH (the sd was 4 and she used to steal money from her BM's purse, shoplifting sweets). Long story short, one day on our way out from the shop, we've got stopped by the security guards to inform us that sd has stolen sweets. Dh was shocked & disappointed cos he didn't know this. Hence the BM knows everything about D shoplifting but she never informed him. She narrated how she has stopped taking the D to shops with her, since she doesn't know how to talk to her. DH punished her and had a good talk with her. Sd [7] now, I think she has stopped it and we're testing her by leaving little coins laying around to see if she's still doing it. 

Harry's picture

For not parenting his kid.  Put the real blame on the person who is doing nothing.  This is not going to stop until DH stop it.