I claim my SDs as just that-my SDs. We are all ok with that.

I have no bios, so when asked I tell people I have no kids, at least none that I know about.

If they are smart enough to get the joke, then I go on to say my DH has a daughter.

I don't claim skids.

I claim mine. I just say I have 4. Two boys and 2 girls. Not very many people know one is my SS. He calls me mom and I raise him like my own. The way I see it he is just as much mine as someone who adopts children if they can't or don't physically have their own. The only place I distinguish the difference is on steptalk. He an I have our ups and Downs just like I do with my own son. My eldest is from a prior and he calls my husband dad. No one has a clue we're blended because its our family and we're together by choice not because we're stuck with the other ones kid. Its all or nothing here and we choose all.

His BM hates that he calls me mom but it was HIS choice. He is my son from what think of as surrogate mother.

I don't claim my oldest step kid. She is 19 and I CLEARLY didn't have her at 13 years old (my DH is 8 yes older than I). We don't see her, she is bitter from their divorce and BM pulled PAS saying she'll "fix her later ".

I think maybe the lables puts distance between stepparents and step children. Once I decided that he was mine and I had all the rights and responsibilities as his biological mother our family became a cohesive unit. If a family member said something about him being my stepson I reply with no he is my son from a different mother. I don't ever let him feel like the red headed step child. No one deserves to grow up on the outside looking in.

I refer to Ss as my Stepson or my husbands son. If Bm weren't in the picture (one could only hope!! ha!!) and he lived w/ us full time I might feel/say differently but He has a mom so I don't feel the need to say he's anything more to me. I do consider him family but I just feel weird saying "he's my son". Maybe that will change when my daughter is born??

I don't claim my SDs as my own. I refer to them as my DH girls. Their mom has them 90% of the time so I just don't feel it would be proper referring to them any other way. Perhaps if I was more invited to be more involved in their lives it would be different, but BM will have none of that.

I do the same as echo. I say we have 3. I only elaborate when I have to - usually when I am asked ages and have to explain that the boys aren't twins , just step brothers.

I just say, "DH has 2 daughters."

I say I have no kids but my hubby has 4 from a previous. I don't claim the step kids as my own because the mother of them brain washes them enough to say I am not part of their lives and has made sure they never associate with me when they come here. As bad as my dumb hubby wants me to be part of their lives it is kind of hard that he does not fight against the witch that brain washes them to make sure she is in every conversation when they come here on their visits.