It never ends! Even with SS20 out of the house now, DH still bends over backwards to coddle him.

SS moved out not long after my last entry. He said he was renting a place with a friend for $250, including utilities. Great, he should be able to afford that. That was in September, toward the middle of the month.

October comes along, weekend of Oct 11/12th and my in laws come to stay with us for the weekend. SS comes over to see is grandparents and is whining to Grandma that he "had to take out a payday loan" to pay his next month of rent, is behind on his Credit Card bill and his student loan bill. This kid works at Walmart making $10/hr, what the hell is he doing with his money that he couldn't afford to pay his 2nd month of rent?!? I don't say anything because I'm not giving hubby a chance to offer to pay his rent!

I do ask him when he thinks he's going to catch back up on his phone bill with us. Both SS20 and SD21 are supposed to pay their dad $30 for the phones that are on his account. I tell SS, I'm not asking for money now, just a payment arrangement that he'll stick with since he's 3 months behind.

He gets all kinds of huffy and throws $60 at me, saying "now I won't have any money for food". OMFG grow up!

Next month passes with not much contact with him, until the 2nd weekend in November when we take him, my DD11 and my mom out to dinner to celebrate all of our birthdays. Dinner goes off without a hitch, I don't even bring up the phone bill again. Told DH it's his responsibility, so of course it doesn't get brought up.

DH and I start talking about what to get the kids for their bdays/Christmas. I suggest we could pay off part of SS's payday loan for his bday and Christmas present. Would help him more than any physical gift we could get him. I suggest up to $200-250. Not the whole thing but most of it, and SS be responsible for the rest. DH seems ok with this but then the subject is dropped.

In the meantime, on several different occasions, DH drives the 20-30 minutes each way (depending on traffic) to pick SS up and take him to work because "it's too cold for him to ride his bike to work". Whatever.

Fast forward to right before Christmas, SS texts hubby whining that he needs a car, is getting tired of riding his bike in the cold. DH responds telling him to start saving money every month to buy one. SS replies that he can't save money, he's already super behind on all his bills. DH asks SS what he is doing with his money? SS gives DH some sob story about he bailed a friend out of jail, and now all his debtors are calling him 2-3 times a day, their heat is about to get turned off cuz they're behind on that. Pipes froze in the kitchen, so the stove had to be moved to fix the pipes. Microwave is on the fritz so they have no way to cook food. Wah cry me a river SS...but DH bought it hook, line and sinker!

DH also texts SS to ask how much the loan is, SS says $350. DH tells him we will pay the entire thing off, and that he'll take SS shopping for some food. Wow, glad we have so much money to just give away like that!

I jumped DH about doing so much, it's not our fault that he's struggling. DH says "we won't help him every month"...I remind him that we already do! We haven't seen phone money since Oct, so we're helping him $30 every month.

Told DH he should have talked to me first before telling SS we'd pay off the entire payday loan, which with late fees ended up being $370. We could have made an extra car payment, an extra partial house payment or even started up our gym membership again!

The best part is his roommate just gave SS 2 weeks notice to find another roommate or SS will have to pay the full $500 and all utilities himself come January. I see another payday loan in his future, now that his previous one is paid off!

And the icing on this whole fucking pile of shit that is my life- DH and I have been trying to get pregnant since June. DH informs me last week that if we're not pregnant this month, that I should go back on birth control until April, then we'll start trying again. His reasoning he says, is that he doesn't want another November-January baby. I call BS, he just doesn't want to miss the NASCAR races in November. Well if he wants to stop trying, fine. But I'm not getting back on birth control, messing up my body/cycles again, and stop taking it again in 4 months. If we're not pregnant/after my friendly visitor in a week or so, he'll be told "condoms or no sex, your choice".

Truth be told, I'm glad I'm not pregnant so it's not a messy divorce down the road when I get thoroughly tired of DH babying his adult son and kick his ass out. Not that I'm not already tired of it, but I just know it's going to come down to helping SS with his bills or paying our bills, because DH is about to be laid off, and that's where I will draw the line!

Oh and remember the party and missing things? DH's really nice hunting/boning knife came up missing. He went to pack it for a hunting trip and...it was nowhere to be found, he always leaves it on his nightstand. Yep, in plain view for anyone to see that may have walked in to our bedroom when we weren't home.