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Removal of Spousal Support

Anne Boleyn's picture

FDH pays spousal support to BM. Per the original agreement, it will last for another few years unless BM gets married. It also says "this is unchangeble". BM just announced she will be moving herself and the kids in with her boyfriend soon. I've heard of cases where co-habitation is considered like marriage and spousal support has been revoked. I am hoping he'd have a case for that here. Right now, it's not a lot per month that he pays but if his pay goes up by a couple thousand dollars per year (which it will), her support $ goes up almost 10x. It would kill us.

Anyone have any insight into this?

Comments

princessmofo's picture

Ask your attorney. In our state cohabitation trumps spousal support. So live with the opposite sex and lose support.

Anne Boleyn's picture

Thanks. He can't afford an attorney. He had to go alone to the last court date for CS modification. I am trying to figure it out with information online and can't figure it out. Maybe I am Googling the wrong thing.

Anne Boleyn's picture

I finally Googled the right combo. Apparently the state legislature passed something that covers this. There is a good chance he could have it removed. Thank god. I am getting really nervous as his income is reaching that threshold. I also just realized they both have their FB pages wide open to the public so time to take some screen shots to prove they are a couple and not roomies. FDH can thank me later. Smile

Anne Boleyn's picture

FL

smithsgirl's picture

Just make sure that you don't mention anything to her until you have the definitive evidence otherwise you don't know what she'll do to make sure it continues.
Luckily my partner has to pay a whole 12p a year spousal maintenance, lol.

Pilgrim Soul's picture

My DH paid BM maintenance even when her new partner practically lived with her - was there 6 out of 7 nights, had moved her dogs in, bought new furniture for the house. They had researched this issue and in my state it looks like if you have a separate residence elsewhere and pay bills there, you are not cohabitating in the eyes of the court. The BM's girlfriend (they are gay) kept her house and paid mortgage on it. Until she did not - when when she rented it out and moved in with all her stuff, not just some of it, it became official. The support stopped.

It was a total rigmarole, however. Greedy *****es.

hereiam's picture

I Googled "cohabitation and spousal support" and came up with a lot of articles and info but, of course, it depends on the state and the situation.

Your FDH should not let his ex know that it is even a slight possibility that he might fight for this (no angry threats in the heat of the moment) because if she's smart, she could cover her tracks as to what she actually contributes to the household and what her exact relationship with the guy is. Because if I were the ex that wanted to have my cake and eat it, too, I would be sure to still have bills in my name, have a rental agreement, and basically make it look like BF was a roommate (at least, financially).

Anne Boleyn's picture

You're very right. I will advise him to keep his mouth shut.

I am going on a Facebook screenshot-athon later this afternoon. Fortuantely for us, they have recent photos of them kissing, etc.. I'm sure they will announce "We are moving in together!" soon too.

I just read that FDH will have to prove that she doesn't need his support now. I am not sure how he can prove what she is contributing to their household other than to prove that this is more than a roommate situation and that this is a de facto marriage.

hereiam's picture

If the house and utilities are in the BF's name, that's a start and should be pretty easy to find out.

Will the ex actually have to go for a modification to get the increase in support if his income changes?

Anne Boleyn's picture

I believe he's renting the house that he lives in. She's moving in there. So it should be pretty straightforward as I doubt he will modify his lease to add her. Maybe I can take sceren shots of a Google look-up of his name that shows his address. Any idea how to prove he pays utilities there?

I am not sure how that works. I know the decree spells out the amount of alimony based on level of income (it's a tiered thing). And they both have the right to request one another's tax returns at any time. So she'd have to request them again from him (which he would hand over). But not sure how she'd have his pay check changed to accomodate new amount without a new court order. Does that make sense?

Anne Boleyn's picture

I think the law of the state can trump that. Based on my reading today, depending on the state, the court may consider cohabitation to be a de facto marriage thereby allowing the paying spouse to terminate payments.

Anne Boleyn's picture

Well, that is less than encouraging! I think the best course then is to give it some time. Hopefully, their living arrangement will last for a while. Although, I know what he's in for with her lack of active parenting and kid issues so I can't wait to see how that plays out.

Thanks for finding that link. It was quite helpful.

hereiam's picture

Definitely give it time so you know their living arrangement is going to be an ongoing, long term thing.

That's why I asked about how the increase in spousal support comes about because it might not be worth your FDH pursuing a termination until an increase is looming. He may just start the ball rolling on the increase himself!

Hopefully, she will just leave well enough alone and not pursue an increase.

Anne Boleyn's picture

Good point. Maybe she will catch wind that spousal support can go away if you're cohabitating and keep her mouth shut. This whole thing is so scary to me because if she is awarded the higher amount, my life as I know it is pretty much ruined.

hereiam's picture

It sucks, doesn't it, that someone else has that kind of input into your life? My husband never paid spousal support but dealing with BM and child support was bad enough. Thank God, it's all over for us.

I wish you luck.