Here is how I do it with the CS I recieve:

It is to use towards the maintainance of the kids. This can include food, shelter, clothes, vacation costs, extra-cirriculars, day care, etc. whatever comes up. My EH does not pay one penny over the amount the state requires him to pay - except for 50% of medical bills.

How I handle it is simple - I put it in my main bank account and put it towards the household bills. I would have a hard time itemizing what it specifically goes towards since I mix my funds from the ex and my income. If at the end of the month I did not need it, I move it to a savings account I have for the kids. If I needed it to cover an expense, child related or not, I use it.

My ex-husband thinks I am living large on his child support which is laughable. I have a 16 year old sone that eats half the support I get from him in groceries! Seriously, I make a good living so the extras he sees the kids get are derived from my income not his stupid child support.

Mine makes up barely the difference of what our combined earnings were. With my exH gone I have more bills and less money even with the CS, I have the kids. I take care of their food, clothes, school, snacks, shoes,cdll phones, extra curriculars, sports, mortgage, utilities, car, insurance, medical, and every single incidental. the exH feeds them every other weekend (and threw a fit he was expected to feed them dinner on Friday's he picked them up and the Sunday's he dropped them off because one or the other was enough not both) now he does feed them both only because he decided it would make me look bad to tell people "I have to feed my kids dinner Friday's and Sunday's when I have them or their mom will let them be hungry (really seriously dickhead I feed them 3 meals apx 24 days a month and wouldn't let them starve but be a parent!)
Anyway my cs goes to whatever they or I need. CS is by law for whatever the custodial parent wants even if that means beer and smokes (which I'm currently out of because food comes first and it's making me grumpy)

I learned not to depend on mine. Not because my EX is jerk but because not long after we divorced years ago he wasn't able to pay for me a time so I learned to live without it. (He has long since caught up) I actually have a seperate account that money goes in and I only ever touch it if my half of our daughters medical bills is extremely high, there is a big expense like a special camp, clothes shopping etc. Because I let the account build up, I was able to help my daughter by her first car by matching her dollar for dollar up to a certain point. I also put a bunch in her college fund.

If I actually received and could depend on getting mine, I would spend it on whatever the household was in need of, since I consider "child support" to be making up for the parent who is not there. If the father/mother was still there they would be (hopefully) contributing to the household and would do so without itemizing or delegating for who or what the money was spent on. My daughter's father has flat-out refused to pay his CS because he "thought" I would spend a portion of the funds on myself. And honestly I haven't, though it's not his business to care if I had. Pretty sure any time I got a payment, I had already paid to have my car fixed that month, or my daughter had been sick, or something else out of my control that was an extra expense. It's nice if you don't need it and can put it away for college or something, but if you do need it, don't feel guilty about buying whatever it is you need.

CS should be used on anything relating to the kids, rent/bills, gas. It can be used on anything. Our bm has never paid, and she has never had custody, so we never paid cs, but I knew a girl who used her cs money to go out to eat with her boyfriend, go shopping, go to the bar, buy ciggarettes... its a debit card.

As a CP, I saw it as my responsibilty to put food on the table, a roof over her head, and clothes on her back. I saw CS as a way to give her nikes instead of blue light special, steak instead of ramen. In other words CS was only a portion of raising DD.

BM though calls and tells DH that his CS doesn't cover everything. My question is does it really cost $19k a year to raise two children? In our state that is considered basic neccessities. Extra curricular activities are over and above the support. Needless to say DH says no to a lot of extras

currently we are trying to get the adjustment to one child, that "savings" will be a whopping 1500.

Bm wanted full support, DH to cover medical, all extra curricular, pay all vehicle expenses.

Child support monies "go for" the Basic Child Support Obligations. At least in my state. In my hubs situation, basic child support does NOT include medical expenses or extracurriculars or other 'unplanned and unusual expenses". They actually had to re-define that in recent mediation. Medical and ECs costs are separate from CS either at their percentages or 50/50, I can't recall. But as far as what it is CS "used on" well, the receiver of CS can use it for a pedicure and hair color if she wants to - I don't think there are any guidelines or enforcement of that, unfortunately. As long as the children appear well-fed and in acceptable clothing on a regular basis, nobody who counts, cares.

Child support, however, does not necessarily cover EVERYTHING for the care of the child. My TM gets confused on this one. She thinks that DH's CS check should cover 100% all of her costs to have the children 50% of the time. DHs payment only covers the DISCREPANCY between their incomes. If their income was equal and they shared equal custody - nobody would get child support because you are sharing half of the child support obligations equally from your own resources.

My daughters and I have this discussion a lot. In 12 years, we have not received any child support. That means that EXH owes me over 40 grand.

He is fresh out of prison and going to college to be a drug and alcohol counselor. (snicker)

SO, IF he ever pays me the 40 g's, how should I split it up? I have a 14, 16, and 19.

I think I should put 7 grand in accounts for each girl, and keep the other half. I have soley supported them since they were 3, 4, and 7. (My oldest thinks they should get all of the support money.)

I <3 my Step Talk friends! Thanks for the backup. It's appreciated.