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Why does MIL make it SS against BD?

briarmommy's picture

Submitted by briarmommy on Tue, 08/02/2011 - 9:34pm

I knew that my MIL favored SS, she doesn't even try to hide it. She also goes out of her way to try to say that SS was farther along delvolpmentaly at his age then my daughter even though everyone else including DH and MIL's sister and mother say that our daughter is months ahead of SS at that age. So I log on facebook today and she is saying that my daughter is just now walking at 14mths and that she was slow.......

FIRST...My daughter has been walking for 2mth since she was 12mths old
Second..She was taking steps for a month before that
THird...According to DH SS didn't walk till he was almost 16mths old

What kind of grandmother goes on facebook and says that her grandaughter is slow, even if she was it would be a mean thing to put there. She also then in the comments section of her status said that my daughter was difficult and that I looked tired because of it.........My daughter is the easiest kid ever, she has slept though the night since she was a month old, she eats her food herself now and never is messy(except yogurt or oatmeal I still help with those) She doesn't cry and has never had a tantrum. How is my daughter difficult? MIL still trys to insist though that SS was such a better baby even though according to DH, SS cried constantly, couldn't feed himself until he was 2 and didn't sleep through the night till he was over a year old. MIL also says that my daughter is mean because she trys to take her glasses, I think every 1yr old will try to take glasses if you are wearing them I don't think it makes her mean. Yah my daughter is so behind SS. I just don't get the point of even comparing them, why try to make one look worse then the other? They are both her grandchildren the worst thing is that she says these things to SS. SO SS goes around telling people that my daughter is mean and difficult. I am so sick of this woman I don't even want her around my daughter anymore and to be honest my daughter doesn't want to be around her either, when MIL comes around my daughter trys to get away from her I think she can sense that this woman doesn't feel the same about her, on the other hand she loves my mother and laughs as soon as she sees her and trys to get to her right away. My mother has older grandchildren from my sister,she even lives with my sister and those children, she sees them everyday and still doesn't act like she plays favorites. THats a grandmother, MIL isn't a grandmother she is a b*tch.

Comments

LONGTIME SM's picture

Submitted by LONGTIME SM on Tue, 08/02/2011 - 9:51pm

I think I would have to respond with many many comments on MIL's wall exclaiming the wonders of the sweetest little grandchild ever. Not confrontational just informational - matter of fact. Tag her with many upon many pics of the sweetest baby in the world! I would be tempted to really play it up and report that your baby actually calls out for MIL when she's not around or this bevaio reminds you of MIL(now don't gag when you do this)etc. etc. etc!!!

MILs family and friends will have to wonder why in the world she is attacking an innocent baby that is obviously the most adorable thing in the world! Those that already know what she is up to may hijack her wall and make similar supportive comments.

Continue this any time she posts something ugly! If she blocks you for sending her baby pictures who looks like the real loser here? Good luck.

briarmommy's picture

Submitted by briarmommy on Tue, 08/02/2011 - 9:58pm

I do post tons of stuff about my daughter on there and her whole family is friends with me on facebook and see it and comment how sweet and beautiful she is. At family gatherings her own sister even called her out on it when MIL got mad that people were complementing my daughter so she but in and said that SS never cried either etc..etc.. Everyone looked uncomfortable and her sister called her out on it and said no, SS cried what are you talking about. MIL didn't say anything more that day about it.

Ex4life's picture

Submitted by Ex4life on Tue, 08/02/2011 - 9:53pm

I really think I would probably keep my BD away from grandma for awhile and be sure to tell her just why i was doing it. In my thinking one of 2 things would happen; either she would straighten up or she wouldn't be around my BD anymore to make her feel bad.

briarmommy's picture

Submitted by briarmommy on Tue, 08/02/2011 - 10:01pm

I keep her away from my daughter as much as possiable but DH still wants her to see our daughter about once a month so he will take her to see her but only for about an hour a time, the rest of time though if he is going with SS or picking up SS from her our daughter and I stay home or go to my moms. DH doesn't really like to take our daughter to MIL's that much either though because her house is filthy and there is dog pee everywhere so there is nowhere to put her down.

briarmommy's picture

Submitted by briarmommy on Tue, 08/02/2011 - 10:13pm

I think a big part may be to because DH and his ex lived with her until they seperated when SS was 2 1/2 so she feels likes how much imput and control she has always had with SS. Even now she picks up SS for his weekends because DH works friday nights and I don't have a car so SS spends every other friday night with her during the school year. She knows that I will never let her have that much power over my daughter and resents that now I have more input over SS as well then her because I am his primary caregiver during the summer when he is here all summer. I think she is threatend by me. She conects with BM because they are both work aholics who don't clean or cook or take good care of themselves. I am the oppisite, I stay home, my house is always clean and I cook all our meals. So I think a big part of it is against me and my daughter is paying the price.

briarmommy's picture

Submitted by briarmommy on Wed, 08/03/2011 - 7:42am

Control thats the magic word, she wants control of everything. She wants to control the kids, our house,us but we don't let her control us so she tries the only person she can somewhat control...SS.

The funny thing is that DH doesn't let her control us at all, he doesn't let her babysit our daughter or even see her more then one visit a month but he does let SS go there and spend the night and be watched by here. DH avoids him mom at all costs so I think SS is like a sacrafice, heres SS so leave me alone kinda thing. The problem is that as SS ages her influence plus the influence of BM is ruining him and DH doesn't want to deal with that, the whole path of least resistence man thing.

I don't even see her anymore unless I have to like I'll see her tonight because DH said that SS could spend the night with her and she will be picking him up after DH goes to work.