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Father's Day

christag's picture

I wish I could go back to the days when my adult stepkids didn't call on Father's Day. Thinking back, I was blessed with incommunicado skids. Now they give DH the gift of 15 hours worth of old home movies transfered onto DVD for Father's Day. Whatever happened to giving a tie?

DH didn't even tell me his kids had called or sent him anything until I griped that they hadn't done anything for Father's Day. Apparently, they called his cell and sent his present to his office. DH didn't say anything until I asked, then he couldn't stop gushing about how great this was.

Maybe it's a thoughtful gift to some, but I see ulterior motives. This wasn't about getting DH a nice gift. If they wanted to give something nice, they could have sent him an iPad, not have 15 hours of old 8mm movies put on DVD to remind their father of all happy times of his first wife and biokids. They always find some way to make everything about them and especially their mother. Give it a break! She died. It's sad, but it's time to move on and stop living in the past. Instead, every since holiday has to be a remembrance of their mother.

Of course, I can't say anything like that to DH. Luckily he didn't invite me to watch the videos. I don't even think he brought them home. I'm trying so hard to disengage, not care about the skids. I haven't asked one question about SD's wedding or how SS's pregnant wife is doing. Now they pull something like this.

Comments

alwaysanxious's picture

I can understand your point of view. But... My husband did die and if we had a kid together and they got me that gift I would have liked it.

I wouldn't have shared it with SO and no, I wouldn't have asked SO to watch them either.

I personally hate it when SO watches home movies of him and his kids/ex. Its very rare that he does it. but it does annoy me. I get your point of view on this.

I don't think though that the gift was living in the past. It was something they wanted to do for their father and its father's day so the gift was their choice. I think it was sensitive of them to send it to his work and not make you feel awkward. Believe me they have moved on from their mothers death, but you don't get over it you get used to it.

Try to let this one go. Just don't ask your DH about his gift.

Disneyfan's picture

Sounds like a great gift that meant a lot to your husband. The SKs and husband tried to keep you from being hurt/bothered by the gift. (mailed to the office, watched at the office). Why did you want to gripe about them not getting their dad a gift? If that were the case, your gripe would have made him feel worst. Everyone tried to spare your feelings, but you didn't do that for your husband. Karma?

Easylikesundaymornin's picture

Funny it was a Father's Day gift ~ wasn't it. How ironic that his kids would want to do something from the heart for their father. Gosh they are horrible children.

Maybe it's not your cup of tea ~ but the present really wasn't meant for you.