LONG post, sorry and I don't blame you if you don't read the whole thing, this is me venting!
Backstory, I’ve had a rocky relationship with my oldest sister for about three years. She can be a venomous person. When our Mom got really sick about a year ago and was hospitalized, the three of us “girls” put whatever personal issues we had aside to take care of our Mom

Since then, I’ve been tentatively dipping my toe back into the “sister” thing with my oldest sister and keeping arms length, politeness and putting aside some of the grief she caused me things are going smoothly

She sent me a text message on Monday, saying that our Dad, step-mom & mom were coming up to her house for the 4th of July, invited me, biokid and DH to come over. Nothing fancy, just a pool to swim in and burgers & dogs on the grill and a covered patio or air conditioned house to beat the heat

Sunday night, my 27yo step-son (leech) was waiting for his g/f to get ready to go to her Sisters house for dinner, he asked if we could “do something” on the 4th because her family would probably invite them to a bbq, and he didn’t want to go and deal with her mother (honestly, I don’t blame him. her mother is a drunk and about four beers in, starts to get insulting) is that MY Problem? nope! She’s YOUR girlfriend!

The Mister says “sure, we can do something” and they plan on Leech cooking (he’s a “chef”) and us having a “cookout” for the 4th.

Yesterday AM I woke up early and cleaned the house (admittedly, was letting crap like vacuuming go to see how long they’d let their kid crawl around on cat hair and dirt on the rug… couldn’t deal w/ a dirty house anymore)

Around 11-ish, I said to The Mister, since I didn’t see my Dad on Fathers’ Day, I’d like for us to go up to my sisters and take Pop his gift and cart.. we could hang a little and then come home

He got pissy… like ROYALLY pissy… WE agreed to have a cookout today (no YOU did, I just sat there and listened to that conversation)
He accused me of taking the better offer that came down the pike after WE made plans, then said that he knew what was going to happen, we’d go and then I’d have a glass of wine and wouldn’t want to leave…
Fine, Not gonna argue with you over this… WE’LL have our ‘cookout’

Leech woke up sometime around 2pm…the g/f had been in and out of the house all day. I asked her if her family was having a party and she said “no” and looked at me like ‘why would you ask?”
Leech was in and out of the house from 2-4
At 4:45 I said, when’s he gonna cook?
WHAT? he made the chicken yesterday, YOU were going to use that in the dish YOU were supposed to make today… remember?
No I don’t remember
Fine
So… I cooked
Leech, the G/F took the grandbaby to the park… no not the little playground behind our house, they went to the lake that’s a half hour a way
So me, biokid and husband sat and ate
Leech and family came home at 8-ish
They didn’t eat anything I cooked
I cooked A LOT because it was supposed to be for five grown people (I refrain from using the word “adult” when it comes to them)

Biokid asked if her friend could come over and watch fireworks , told her that would be great! (she didn’t get to do much all day, since we didn’t go to my sisters)
(I spent a lot of money on fireworks, I LOVE fireworks)
At 8:30 (before it was even dark) leech starts setting off fireworks without telling me or biokid he’s starting
(apparently he told Husband, who didn’t think it was a big deal to have to tell us)
My kid is frantically calling her friend, who said that she’d be about five minutes getting ready and she’d be right over (her friend lives on the other side of our neighborhood, it’s about a 7 minute walk)

I said to Leech, can you wait a bit for the rest of those fireworks, biokid’s friend is coming over… at that point, he says to me we only have three left

What I didn’t know, is that when he started, he was setting off three at a time!
I said “why’d you start so early and why didn’t you tell us you were starting?? Who gave you the OK to start lighting off fireworks?”

He said it was for his son and he “always does the fireworks” it’s his “thing” every year!

Well, ladies and gentleman, last straw!

I realize that right after the sentence that says “he got pissy” this story SHOULD read Then I said to him “fine, you don’t have to go, biokid and I will go to my sisters and you can have your “cookout’ with your son and his girlfriend”

But NO… I didn’t!

Instead, I sat around my house doing practically nothing
Biokid was on her computer and watched TV and was trying to make plans with a friend
The Husband went back and forth between working (he works from home a lot) and watching TV

When what I SHOULD have been doing was seeing my parents and stepparents and letting my kid be outside, in the pool having FUN

I know that I REALLY have myself to blame on this one… I am JUST as mad at me as I am at him

I told him how I felt about all of it this morning and he said “I apologize, I don’t know what happened”

And that’s it.. I have to accept his “apology” and let it go, because it’s my own damn fault that I let him get EXACTLY what he wanted…