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My Kid is driving my husband & I crazy...

cpreston's picture

when is she going to learn? she missed the bus yesterday (even though I saw her eating breakfast, looking ready to leave the house when I leave for work, she missed the bus)
The Mister was INFURIATED, and said to her "well, I guess you're just going to have to miss school, right?" she panicked because it's the end of the year and she had two final exams...
She yelled at him and said "If I miss my final exams, I'm going to f***-ing FAIL" :jawdrop:
she then called me in hysterics

he of course wasn't going to let her miss final exams, he was just pissed because she missed the bus AGAIN (like the 6th time for the school year)

he took her to school,on the way he said to her, turn over your phone now
"no"
what? J, give me your phone!
"no, I don't have to give you my phone"
she got out of the car, started walking, he called after her and she ignored him
(he told me he had visions of getting out of the car, and TAKING the phone from her, but since it was in front of school, he didn't want to make a scene and have to explain himself)

AARRRRGGG!
she called me at work when she got home and had the NERVE to argue that she shouldn't lose her phone and computer privleges!

I told her, the cmputer isn't to be touched and the phone better be in my room when I get home
it was...
she's grounded again, for the rest of the week. we leave for vacation next weekend
Mister wants to keep her 'grounded' on vacation, I told him that'll only prove to make EVERYONE miserable
He also wants her to die her hair back to her natural color
(I told her she could have the red streaks as long as she kept her grades up... she's an honor roll student... I don't want to go back on that deal)
when is she going to get it through her thick head that she can't just do whatever it is she wants, say whatever she wants to say, and treat people (my husband mostly) poorly?
I have told her, if she were to just treat him and I with dignity and respect, that she'd be the happiest kid on the planet! yet somehow she can't get it thru her thick skull!

Comments

cpreston's picture

she's 13 and a HALF... if we let her live she'll be 14 in January
(she's morphing into one of those snotty kids I hate!)

Shaman29's picture

She's 13??

Replace all of her underwear with Granny Panties. Tell her she can have her regular ones back when she starts treating you and Mister with more respect. }:)

BSgoinon's picture

I suppose so. I am trying to think of what would have whipped me in to shape when I was 13. Probably nothing. I was a little jerk.

cpreston's picture

TV was disconnected last night too, that goes along with the phone and the computer usage every time they get taken away.
She's got a clock radio in her room, if she curses again, I'm taking that away too. She'll have to go back to my waking her up every morning till gets her 'stuff' back

Shaman29's picture

My first inclination was to suggest taking away phone, TV, Computer, etc. But then I remembered DH's kid when she was reduced to bed, desk and a pair of socks for entertainment.

My experience has shown me you can take all of their stuff away and they'll still behave like little s**ts.

Then I remember what a brat I was at 13. I would have been mortified if I was forced to wear granny panties. And we didn't have low rise jeans back when I was a teenager. Granny panties in today's jeans would be an awesome way to get the point across.

Beautiful Dreamer's picture

I had a feeling she was a teen. I don't know what I'm going to do when my daughter becomes a teen. She already has an attitude problem (which she gets from DH) and she is only 4.

cpreston's picture

NowHave5, you hit the nail on the head! I've told him this before. You'd think after our being together for so long, he'd understand that WE have to parent this kid, not just ME... and that part of WE means that HE has to do what a parent should do in these situations.
(and yes, my kid is a problem, I'm doing what I can to correct it, wondering if family counseling is the next step)

cpreston's picture

I have told her this repeatedly. The last time, we had a discussion about her behavior when things were calm and I was trying to have a rational talk with her... I said something to the effect of "we are raising you as a team, he loves and treats you like his own" her response was "yeah well he's NOT my Dad!"
Yeah, I know he's not your Dad... but we all live together as a family and he is a "parental figure" in your life. It's OUR house, OUR rules, he's got the same authority as I do...You have to listen to him like you'd listen to me

(what I wanted to say.. no he's not your Dad, your Dad shows up whenever he feels like, gets you a happy meal at mcdonalds like you're still four years old and then drops you off at home and feels like he's done his job as a DAD) but I kept that part to myself

just.his.wife's picture

Hm perhaps a compromise:

She looses the phone and computer for the rest of the week for missing the bus.

She looses them for vacation for being disrespectful/defiant to her SF. I bet she did not even thank him for driving her to school and saving her from failing which would have lead to her being in far MORE trouble- because she did not manage her time accordingly. (you might point out that would hav lead to her being grounded from everuthing but breathing for the entire summer)

You grounded her for the rest of the week for missing the bus. Let her SF ground her for the defiance and disrespect. Consult with him ahead of time, agree on a punishment, and when he administers it BACK HIM UP.

13 is the worse age for a girl and if you allow this to keep happening, your in for hell in another few years.