In my opinion if you are living with SO then of course you should by clothes and anything else for his child, the child should not even be thought of as his child, you should want to do things for you stepchild if you plan on being with SO for life. If you have 50/50 then yes it is up to dad to buy things for his child but if you two plan on being a family then you two need to do this together and not let the child feel that you do not want to buy him anything. If you are going to open a fund for one of your children then you should do it for the other child also. Both of the kids are SOs and there is no way that he should let one be treated different than the other. If you two have the stepchild 50% of the time then you both need to treat him like he is there all the time, afterall it is not the childs fault that he is a step.

Absolutely...I buy my SD's lots of things and my husband does the same for my sons. Equal treatment for all children. We don't treat any skid differently than our own birth children. It is not right, fair, and they see and feel all things. That is why we all get along beautifully and love each other so much. Open the account and have the same amt of money for all children, otherwise they will resent and hate one another when older.

Boss Baby

But, if my Wife ever surprises me with a Whoops SS will retain an equity share of our estate. Though I am not a genetic participant in his life I am his Dad. I have been Dad since he was 15mos old and I am the only full time father he has ever had.

The guy who gave him his last name is just SpermDad and has never contributed and never will contribute anything of value to his life.

So, I would say that as a starting point deal the Skid in as an equity heir. After all you are married to his father and if you predecease your DH then things can shift in the inheritance department for the kids and skids.

If the SKid turns out to be an evil POS you can lock him out of a later revision to your Will.

That is the cool thing about a Will. You can disposition your assets as you see fit.

Just my thoughts of course.

Best regards,

Success is rarely final. Failure is rarely fatal. It is character, courage and consistency of effort that count. Vince Lombardi (with some minor Rags modifications) To each according to their performance, screw Karl Marx. (Rags)

My SS6 lives full time with us as well as my BS17, I have a BD13 who lives with her Dad. My DH and I buy equally for all the children. We have a joint account so we share $$.
Not just clothes, I help with his car payment, daycare ( which x should help pay) and the list goes on. I don't complain nor does he, it is my honor to help take care of his son.

I took my SS shopping and bought him school clothes because what he looks like when he comes from my house reflects the kind of parent I am not just my DH. I take care of getting his undies and socks when he needs them. If you care at all about how the child looks when he/she leaves your house, by all means buy the child things that you find appropriate.
As for the trust, when we open a trust for our children, we will put equal amounts of money in them, because we know that SSs BM would not and we think it is a good thing to do for children. But go with your heart on that one I think. Talk to your SO about it and do whatever feels right.

My SD gets less becuz we have her just wed and EOW BUT if we had her 50% she would have more, my H pays for everything right now since I am still looking for work after graduation....

Trust fund??? I guess I wouldn't for SD but would for my boys if I was the only one putting money in. SD is down for equal share in my life insurance but my boys will recieve ALL of my personal items.

It is a personal choice, all up to you.