Here is my latest BM drama. God I hate that woman. Last week we got a call after what was one of the busiest weekends of my life. My son had his Eagle ceremony attended by 65 people from all over. Very big deal. The next morning he left for a job for the summer only to come home less than 24 hours every week.

DH's Dad called to tell him the dates that SD15 was coming to visit them in NM. We knew nothing about it. Seems that BM overstepped again....She called both his parents and his sister in CA that she wanted to send SD15 to them this summer for a visit. Keep in mind we have no relationship with this girl in over a year. She and DH have seen each other three times. Last time to tell him she really had no reason to see him again and again the week before this to help her get away from BM because she needed a break. My answer was she can't come here. He went and got her and went to a restaurant and talked for an hour and he took her back to the BM. He didn't talk at all. Just let her dig her hole about how evil BM was. She finally said no about something SD wanted. Wow. Anyway, fast forward a week and DH has no idea what FIL is talking about.

So he calls his sister and same thing they have all made plans for her to visit them. DH was asked nothing and would know nothing if his Dad hadn't called with a question. They were shocked that he didn't know. Had they really not been paying attention when he told them on the phone that BM is a bithc and doesn't tell him things and they do not communicate at all? Really!!!!

Why wasn't their statement to her, I should call my brother and check with him, given you have been in a custody battle the last year and half regarding this child? No of course not.

He called BM and put a stop to it for reasons I understand but, I think he should have been harder on BM. He was upset that SS12 was not even considered to go. This is the 2nd time that SD15 has done a large trip and he didn't get to go. She said it was because he would be scared to go by himself and we were taking him on a large trip this year so SD should get to go somewhere. Great for her, but not DH's family.

She is out of control and BM doesn't know what to do with her for the summer. She had bought the plane tickets in 24 hours after she spoke to all of them. Never planning to tell DH. Now, SS12 has been coached by DH not to let BM talk him out of going to CA. He doesn't want to do the NM portion. Doesn't like his Grandma. Smart kid. But, he does want to go to CA to see his Aunt. Of course, last week he told us that BM tried to talk him out of it. He held strong. Right now we are waiting to find out what is happening. But, the entire family is on board with DH that if SS12 doesn't go to CA than SD can not go to any member of his family's house. BM is looking for babysitting for a teenager that is out of control.

My anger is with BM overstepping and actually telling MIL and FIL that she doesn't have to tell DH anything. She does, we still have joint and legal custody of both kids.

I am also angry with the SIL and MIL and FIL that they didn't stop the conversation immediately and call DH. Now I leave on a trip tomorrow with SIL and another brother. I did send an email to SIL telling her that I couldn't believe what had gone down and basically admonishing them for even talking about SD and SS without my DH involved and that if anyone of my family had done that with my Bio they would be out of my life. I explained that the last time she saw SD when we asked her not to, served no purpose for DH's relationship. She talked us into it that she could talk some sense into her. Yeah that really worked....

I am so angry still and now I have to spend my hard earned vacation time with the inlaws. I know I am going to go off on some point if they give advice on dealing with SD15 and BM. They have never had children. Do not give us advice.

Sorry I really needed to vent and give an update on the unbelievable lack of boundaries that this BM has. I swear people do not believe me.

Best thing is I really think SS12 is seeing BM in a whole new light. This caused DH to have to tell him things we never have. But, she pushed it. He said that she said that my husband hasn't tried to see SD15. He said that BM told him DH threw SD out. SS knows that one, since he was here when it happened. He also told him some of the gossip that he and I have been getting about what happened. Including SD telling people that I hit SD. Never happened. He is telling him things I don't agree with, but she has taken off the gloves in telling SS things and DH has to defend our household. I just want SS to get it that he is better off here with us....he just has to say the word...how many times does BM have to neglect him for him to see it?