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ZERO faith

justmakingthebest's picture

Someone please tell me how the F the GAL assigned to SS14 called DH and asked if SS's name was *Mary*? Ummm... no. Then they didn't know our address and wanted to know when we could come to their office -- 1300 miles away!! 

Then we get a letter today from our lawyer where he was CC'ed on the letter being sent to us addressed to Mr. DH and Mrs. BM DH's LastName. UUUHHH... no that isn't her last name and if they are divorced it would be MS. not MRS. I am the MRS. Ohhhh... this just burns my britches! I know it is petty but if you can't even properly address a letter how the F am I supposed to trust you are going to do anything else correctly?

No faith that anything else this GAL will do will be right. All hope is now lost. We don't have enough Crown in my freezer for my feelings tonight. 

Comments

lieutenant_dad's picture

Well, she COULD be Mrs. DH's last name IF she married her BF and kept DH's last name.

Yeah, GALs are either gold or crap. Hopefully these few mix-ups aren't anything major.

thinkthrice's picture

Went by  Mrs. Chef [Chef's Lastname]   or Mrs. Girhippo [Chef's Lastname] well into her engagment to StepDaddyBigBucks.

OH and one of my former co-workers who, thank GOD never had any children to fight over, STILL goes by First Name [Ex DH's Lastname] about five years AFTER her ex DH REMARRIED!!!  She's still single.

 

lieutenant_dad's picture

Eh, I kept my XH's last name, partially for work, partially because I was lazy, and partially because I was at an age where people were more likely to congratulate me on getting married if my namw changed than thinking I was getting divorced. I don't find it odd when women keep their XH's name.

What I DO find weird is when women get remarried, stay married to the new DH for a decade and take his last name, and then get divorced from the new DH and take back their old DH's last name "for the kids". Example: BM in my life.

ITB2012's picture

I'd had it for a long time, it was what everyone knew me as professionally, it helps to have the same name as BS, and I asked XH if he'd be okay with that, plus I didn't change it when I married DH. I told him I'd do it after BS leaves for college but I'm thinking of just leaving it all (since it's such a pain) and just hyphenating where it's not gonna cause a legal problem. But that feels even weirder: to hyphenate my ex and my current husband's last names as my own. I'll probably just stick with XHs. My mom stuck with my dad's last name after they divorced.

TheEvilStepmomStrikesBack's picture

Please go ahead and address this problem with the court now!!!  We had some serious issues with your GAL and we’re gonna file a report after the case to avoid any issues. But the dude ended up recommending mom ( who had coke in a cereal box for BF at the time). There was nothing to do then without sounding bitter that we “lost”. 

justmakingthebest's picture

I will let our lawyer know my concerns and maybe nip it in the butt before we start paying this dumbo. Who wants $500 to start. 

advice.only2's picture

I don't know much about GAL but if they don't even know the name of the child....huge red flag.

When meth ex would take DH back to court for child custody modifications the court always referred to her in paperwork by DH's last name. Not sure if it had something to do with their original divorce paperwork or what, but they did the same with her other ex as well, referred to her by his last name, even though she had changed her name back to her maiden after her second divorce.

Irene H.'s picture

I’m still learning the abbreviations. What is a GAL?

advice.only2's picture

A “guardian ad litem” (GAL) is a person the court appoints to investigate what solutions would be in the “best interests of a child.” Here, we are talking about a GAL in a divorce or parental rights and responsibilities case.

ITB2012's picture

Is it possible that the GAL couldn't read the handwriting of whoever filled out the paperwork?

Still, I'd say something to the lawyer and let him/her submit something on official letterhead that states concerns about the GAL's competency.

tog redux's picture

The problem here is that the GAL represents SS, and will advocate for what he wants. In my state, they MUST take the child's position, especially at 14 - they call them the "Attorney for the Child".  So even if they see alienation, they have to advocate for what the alienated child wants.  Ridiculous, right? This is why parental alienation flourishes in family court.

What are the laws regarding the GAL in BM's state?  I'm sorry you are going through this, I know from experience that a BM with a mission and a child who will lie for her can do very well in court, regardless of what evidence you have.  DH ended up settling repeatedly with BM because SS was such a good liar, it was pointless to continue.

 

justmakingthebest's picture

We are so torn on what to do. To see this flip in SS is sickening. However, do we keep fighting? We know he is brainwashed. We know that this is a never ending money pit. What do we do? Is there a right answer? I am so freaking tired... Just tired of it.