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I knew BM would start something again - now she won't give us her new address

missangie1978's picture

The problem with this is that DH won't send SS down for visitation every other weekend to BM without an address.

BM states she doesn't have to give us an address and will hold us in contempt but we were told we don't have to send SS down without knowing where he is staying.

BM is starting this crap again because I'm pregnant and her employer just got a letter telling them to garnish her wages for child support.

I'm so annoyed I really need those weekends without SS he's driving me even more crazy since I got pregnant!

Comments

Rags's picture

Pretty simple equation I think.

In fact, I would require that BM send a change of address card from the USPS so that you have it on an official medium. She could just give you some random address otherwise. Once she puts it on a USPS change of address card and mails it, fraud becomes an issue and you have more teeth if she is lying.

I understand the frustration with having to deal with SS on "HER" time but, if you play this right you may be able to leverage some major accountability her way.

Hang in there.

Best regards,

OldTimer's picture

That is an absolute fantastic idea... but you don't have to use a USPS card. It can be simply written out and then sent via registered mail... fraud is fraud no matter the medium.

KeepsGettingBetter's picture

As much as you need your time away from SS, I think your DH has made the right decision.
He has every right to know where his child is and if BM isn't going to tell him where his child will be then no visitation.
If she really loves her son and wants to see him she will eventually give in.

Stay strong and take some time out for yourself. Let DH worry about SS and BM.

Done's picture

It is in our court decree that DH and BM have to supply addresses to each other. May be it is stipulated in yours too.

smurfy1smile's picture

We have to give each other mailing addresses - not necessarily physical but mailing so we had a PO box for a while but I had a retraining order against my ex at the time. We have a PO box again since we live in a small town and don't have mail service. BF has never asked for the physical address nor does he care. But I do want to know where my child is during their time away from me whether its with their father or not.

missangie1978's picture

if she doesn't give us an address and I'm fine with that. I'm just pissed that she's starting all this again. She was actually being quiet for a awhile.

She's had so many domestic violence issues with her boyfriends thatwe just can't send SS down because it really isn't safe for him.

She actually lives in the same state just in a different city about an hour away - or at least she use to

imagr8tma's picture

no address no visitation. Especailly if she is not choosing good men to have relationships with and they are causing domestic violence issues.

Sia's picture

within the last 6 months..... send an empty envelope made out to the old address. Mark on the envelope "return service requested". then the PO will return it to you will the yellow address she forwarded her mail to. I have done this a thousand times when BM refused to allow us to know where she is living, etc.... works great!

OldTimer's picture

That is a fantastic idea too! I'm filing that one...

~JustAnotherSM Wink
"Knowledge is often mistaken for intelligence. This is like mistaking a cup of milk for a cow."