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Doing the Most Yet Hated the Most

mndblwn's picture

I try to do all I can to better my stepson and give him opportunities in life. I fought for him to play baseball and watched his BM miss every game and also make him miss 3 games due to her craziness. I've signed him up for swimming lessons this summer since his BM didn't last summer like she said and who knows if she is going to this summer. I make sure he has proper clothing for summer and winter. I reward him when he does good in school or does the chores he is supposed to.

My stepson really likes spending time with my dad. My dad lives in the same town as BM so when stepson goes with BM this summer my dad offered to hang out with him while she works since she only takes stepson to work with her for 8 hours. BM's response is that visits with my dad are to be made during DH's time only. So basically screw us she says.

My stepson thinks she is so great and loves going with her. I know all she does is buy him toys, takes him to movies and lets him eat junk and pretty much do whatever. He is 7 and I know that at that age all the stuff is better then having to clean his room and eat his dinner, but DH and I do our best for him and she basically gets all the credit. We don't tell stepson the nastiness that we get from her. My stepson told DH the other night that BM said that when she starts to drink beer it's hard to stop yet she bags on DH for drinking and DH doesn't drink.

I really want to get along with my stepson because he can be a good kid but I feel there is a wall that he doesn't want to break.


stepmisery's picture

Your post doesn't really say that you and your SS don't get along. Of course he prefers his mother, that's his mom. No matter what she does, he is going to want her love and approval and attention.

You don't need to tell him about the nastiness from her. That's PAS.

If you feel somewhat put out because you do all this planning and doing for this child, yet he still prefers his mother, you may just want to take a step back and let his father do the parenting work in your home.