So my last blog was about how the last time we were supposed to have SD13 she ran away because she didn't want to come to our house and BM encouraged her running away and told us just to leave her alone. This turned into a huge fight with BM and she has gone completely nuts

About 3 months ago SD was having some serious issues. She was cutting and threatening to kill herself. SO and I had had enough of all of the issues she is having and BM not doing anything about it. My sister work for a program for troubled youths and she got us an appointment with them. We had the first initial crisis appointment at our house and it went fine and they determined that she is not a real risk for suicide. The next steps were to get her into a program, which the waiting list is about a year long. To start the process they do an hour long phone interview with the parents, which I did because BM said she was too busy to deal with it, and because BM was going on a trip with her new BF. So I did the phone interview and then set up the initial consultation appointment to determine her issues and which program she should be in. That is scheduled in 2 weeks from now. We involved BM and told her we wanted her at the appointment. She insisted that her boyfriend come and SO told her no way in hell. We are not comfortable discussing our family issues in front of this guy who neither of us have ever met and hes only been around for 5 months. Well BM didn't like that at all! She threw a fit and said that SD wasn't coming to the appointment. Then she changed her story and said that SD agreed to go as long as it was with BM only. We just ignored her and decided that we were just going to cancel the appointment. They waiting list for this program is a year long and im sure there are hundreds of families who are actually serious about getting the help and I would hate to take a spot away from them.
I called to cancel and she advised me to wait until the day before incase BM and SD changed their minds, so I said ok.

Later in the afternoon I get a call from the program office and they leave me a voicemail telling me that BM called them and that SD has requested that we not be at the meeting so we are not to show up. Shortly after, we got a text from BM saying "told ya so. Now im going and youre not".

She is effing crazy!!!!! All this because she wanted to get her own way. So I called the office back and requested our own appointment, since we are the ones that set this all up in the first place. We are very worried the BM is going to go in there and spew lies about us.
Things are getting very serious and both BM and SD have started telling lies to people about us and about why SD doesn't want to come to our house.
SD has some serious mental issues and cannot distinguish between what is reality and what is made up. If you tell her she has a headache, she will think she has one. If you tell her that she was kidnapped by a monkey when she was little, she will believe it and will turn it into a memory. She will tell people that she remembers the monkey coming into her room and kidnapping her. Just as an example.

BM has put so much shit in her head that she truly believes everything BM tells her. I was very disturbed last week when I was talking to SD and she said "Dad drinks too much beer". I asked her to clarify and she said "He drinks beer all the time. There are beer cans all over the kitchen counter." Without a word of a lie, there has not been beer in our house in months. SO drinks beer maybe 3 times a year and its only in the summer. This is just an example of the kind of stuff that she believes because she hears it from BM. Its scary to think what else BM could put in her head and she could tell the counselors and get us in some serious trouble.

SO and I have discussed it and we don't think its best for her to come back to our house before her appointment and before we can figure out whats going on with her. It's too dangerous. She could say the wrong thing and we could get in a lot of trouble. We are both feeling pretty guilty about cutting off contact with her but I really think until this is sorted out, we have no choice.

For the time being We both have blocked BM's cell phone number from our phones so she cannot text us. I guess we will just see how it goes and hope for the best from the appointment