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Well, i gave him the ultimatum. My way or the highway.

ms.blessed.n.distressed's picture

Submitted by ms.blessed.n.di... on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 5:54pm

I will not come second to BMs anymore.

I will not come second to SKids anymore.

I will not have my DH planning my life with his ex and then including me in whatever decisions they have made.

I will not be disrespected by BMs or SKids and be told I'm not allowed to say anything.

DH will stand up for me at all times.

I will stand up for myself at all times.

He nor I will allow myself to be a doormat to anyone esp DH.

He will tell BMs the truth about all I do for SKids and stop taking ny credit just bc he doesn't want to upset them.

My feelings will come first and BMs will come last to everyone.

DH and I will make all the decisions about our lives and SKids together then include BMs in our decision.

BM will not come into my home.

I will be appreciated and respected by everyone for what I do for SKids. If not DH will put BM and SKids in their place.

DH will never again talk down about me to BM or SS.

These are my demands. It is all or none. I will not budge. If they are not met by next Friday. I will be leaving. No exceptions.

Too harsh? Asking too much? Idc even if I am. I've broken my back for DH BMs and SKids and our family. It's my turn to call the shots.

Comments

ms.blessed.n.distressed's picture

Submitted by ms.blessed.n.di... on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 5:58pm

Oh Yah and I will not do all the dirty work for SKids and not be able to discipline them, have a say so or opinion. If I'm doing DH and BMs job then I will do it my way and DH will support me and back me up.

krazykate12's picture

Submitted by krazykate12 on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 7:01pm

I don't think you are being too harsh. My husband wouldn't dream of putting me second to anyone. He fully supports me being in a parental role to his daughter and his daughter is expected to respect me.
Stand your ground and if he doesn't like it then tough. I admire your strength Smile

myhusbandswife's picture

Submitted by myhusbandswife on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 7:03pm

Not too harsh in the least. Not asking too much. I admire and respect you, girl. Best to you!

sonja's picture

Submitted by sonja on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 7:48pm

Oh well said! Post this on the fridge!! I agree with all of the points, please tell me you gave this to him in writing!? (men are stupid.. they need it s p e l l e d out!

lol good luck!

cat1964's picture

Submitted by cat1964 on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 9:31pm

No rights then no responsibilities, that's what I say now.

ThatGirl's picture

Submitted by ThatGirl on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 11:58pm

Yes!! Write it down and post it on the fridge for all to see. Put a hash mark by any one he screws up on and let him know "3 strikes and yer out!"

LizzieA's picture

Submitted by LizzieA on Sun, 10/30/2011 - 2:03pm

Go, girl! All of this is the way it should be, not too demanding. If you start thinking so, put it the other way:

I will be second to BM
I will be second to SKs
I am a doormat to everyone...etc.

Tell 'em all "bite me" if they give you any push back...they can find a new patsy to pick on.

Hollyann1789's picture

Submitted by Hollyann1789 on Sun, 10/30/2011 - 7:57pm

Way to go girl! I love this! I always feel second to my SK and her BM. Her BM calls and want to see her kid, it doesn't matter what plans I have made with them she gets to see her kid. Which is how it should be to a point, she should call more than 20 minutes in advance and if my BF doesn't tell her this soon, I WILL!