HELP MIL LOST JOB!
Ok so mil lost her job and my DH wants them (his mom and dad) to move in with us....I said NO! I feel I have the last say because it is my house...I bought it before we got married/ever knew each other existed! We only have three rooms: ours, the babies room (they share 1 years old and 3 weeks old!!!) and the other room is his two kids for when they come over every other weekend thats it!
the house is only about 1500 square feet (small two story) I don't even really think she (loved me) I knew she didnt hate me, but I was not her favorite person...But since everything with her job happened she has been super nice to me (um mabey cause you tryin to move in MY house!!!) BUT I have found six easy jobs for her to get, but she does not find the time to really go get them ...I think its her pride, its not a real glamourous job/she is not the boss. I found macy's, Cato's, front desk person at hotel, and a position at eye masters....and a few more ...ALL the signs say apply Now, or apply within ....which means if you are nice in appearance and have a decent resume you are in there! I feel a little guilty ...what would yall do?
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Like you, I owned this home
Like you, I owned this home before I married DH. I have final say, and they would not be moving in with us.
That would be a HELL
That would be a HELL NO!!!
You don't have to justify your reasons to anyone.....she is capable of getting a job, so she needs to get one. We have all at times at to work somewhere we didn't want too...it's called LIFE!! You do what you have to do to pay your bills.
Like you, I bought this house years before I met DH, and I'm sorry but I feel everyone should save money and plan for emergencies , especially when you are older and have had years to hopefully set aside money.
I have never understood people who are in their older years and don't have enough money saved to weather some storms. To be blunt I don't feel it is you and DHs job to support her, unless she was Ill or unable to take care of herself, but to not want to get another job....no way!
I'm sorry your in this sticky situation.
I need to add.....parents who
I need to add.....parents who have financially supported their kids or helped their adult kids out should help their parents out. If your MIL has supported or given substantial financial support to you or DH, then I do think you need to allow her to move in with you. Otherwise unless there is a health issue...no
The answer would simply be
The answer would simply be no. If someone were terminally ill and faced being evicted, it would be another issue entirely. But many folks have lost jobs and do what they have to do to make ends meet . . such as taking the first thing they can find . . . not moving in w/relatives, unless they have no choice.
Also, with a baby and small child already in your home, your hands are full. Finally, I was told . .and I believe it, that when you allow people to move it, it's hell to get them to move out.
Good luck.
yeah I guess ....As far as
yeah I guess ....As far as FIL he is disabled, he can walk and talk, he uses a cane he had a stroke years ago....and as far as unemployment a long time ago she got approved for it and got checks, then they denied the claim and told her to pay the money back and she never did!! So when she applied now she got denied..I have two small babies in diapers when I get home Im tired I dont want to chit-chat or nothing I just want to feed the kids, bathe them and put them to bed and watch one 30 minute program take my bath and go to bed....I dont want to fight over the tv or make anyone not feel welcome ...even if I am nice it would be written all over my face that I dont want to be bothered ....Oh and they live in an apartment and have to move at the end of this month !!
It sounds like your MIL may
It sounds like your MIL may not be the most responsible person....I'm really sorry you have to deal with this.
Your husband should totally realize why it's not feasible for them to move in. I couldn't even imagine doing that, especially with 2 very small children.
Please let us know how it works out.
I feel like my DH is pushing
I feel like my DH is pushing me in a corner saying well we may not have a choice ....He does not want his mom on the street well what about the other 6 adult step kids she has (his dad had a lot of kids)...she wanted to tell me how to treat my two ss 8 and 7 when me and DH got together... well since you have such a great relationship with your 6 sk ask one of them! I feel so evil! but I just cant do it...no more being comfortable in my own home I need to find a robe to go downstatirs ...This is not very christian of me....Im ashamed of how I feel
Thanks for all the responses
Good grief, you don't have
Good grief, you don't have much time. Your DH needs to come up with a plan B . . quickly.
Do they have any type of emergency shelter in your state? Are they of retirement age? If so, they should apply for some type of subsidized housing right away. The rent is usually based on income. DH needs to work quickly to find an alternate, so they don't end up on your door step . . . forcing you to let them in because you won't have the heart to turn them away.
Maybe DH can talk to his
Maybe DH can talk to his stepbrothers and they can all chip in to find them a cheap apartment or something? I know it might not be what you want, but they are his parents and they raised him. It sucks even more because it is your house, but if it were DH's house and your parents needed help, would he leave them on the street? There has to be some way you can help, maybe not offering up your house but just offering financial support for a specific amount of time. He can't do NOTHING and if he feels like you don't support him and his parents end up in a shelter or something he will probably resent you for it. Just find another way to help them out that you are more comfortable with. Maybe if you gave DH other options he would be open to one of them and you wouldn't have to have them in your home? Good luck!
MIL needs to get a job!!! The
MIL needs to get a job!!! The poster has already stated their are jobs available but she doesn't want them.
I'm sorry but may e they need to be in a shelter if she refuses to get a job.....I just don't understand that.
Some of us are just hypocritical.....if it was an adult skid we wouldn't be making excuses for them, we would say " GET A JOB!!!!"
Don't see what the difference is.....MIL is unwilling to take a job she feels beneath her, so if they end of on the street, that kinda the consequence . I'm really not trying to be a bitch, I don't think it is right MIL and DH are even asking this, its kinda ridiculous In my opinion.
Better DH be resentful for little bit, then SM be resentful indefinitely !!! Once they move in , chances are they won't be moving out!!!