turning into my mom, LOL
We've been telling SD for the last yr she can invite friends over while she's at our house if she wants to, but she has never taken us up on it. I mean it's true, we live in a different town (though not too far) and we only have her Sat evening-Sun evening, but I thought at least she might have someone over for the afternoon or something. Nope, never even calls her friends when she's here. Well, today FH calls me and says SD wants two of her friends to sleep over tonight, and I'm ALL bent out of shape about it, like to the point of tears! It's so ridiculous, and all I can think about is my mom being upset about me putting her in this position, and me disgusted, unable to understand why this would be a problem at all, my mom protesting about wanting notice, clean up the house, make food, etc and me, the snot nosed brat, rolling my eyes and saying "gawd, my friends don't care about THAT!"
It's too funny b/c now I get it. I get not wanting to be put on the spot for two girls I never met before in my home. I get not wanting to rush around today cleaning the house, worrying about having breakfast foods, I get wanting to just hide in my bedroom. I get feeling overwhelmed by two more people in our one bathroom apartment (okay, my parents had a house with 2 bathrooms but you get my point).
FH is so pleased that SD is treating this place more like her home, and wants to encourage her, plus we didn't let her take anything but the bare essentials back to BM's house from Xmas, so I'm sure she wants to show her friends her presents and what not, and I get all that too, which is why I said yes, THIS time, but in the future, she must plan these things in advance, not day of.
Oh and the best part, this was BM's suggestion, told SD she should have some friends sleep over her dad's house. We have SD for one night of the week, SD is home from school ALL this coming week, but TONIGHT, the one night she is at her dads, is the night friends should sleep over.
LOL. THANKS!
Think I'll buy SD a drum kit for her birthday in a month and INSIST she take it to BM's house....
}:)
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Hey, how did it go?
I understand completely. Our little place is very small, and if anyone asks to stay here it freaks us out!! there just really isn't enough room. And we stay so busy we use the one guest room for storage so have to move stuff around! But it usually works out ok, if we can't get out of it!!
"A lie told often enough becomes the truth." - Vladimir Lenin
Me TOO!
Only I'm the opposite of my mom. I'm not sure who's mom I am becoming! My sister and I are both tough and strict parents. Our mom was a push over. We both ended up pregnant as teens. I think that's a huge part of why we're so concerned for what they are up to. Plus, kids have so much more access to EVERYTHING now. So much communicative technology. My own easy going mom told me she doesn't envy me bringing up my kids now. My sister's are all full grown so she didn't have to worry about all of this either.
I also don't like all the kids in and out of our house. We are known as the "mean" parents in our neighborhood I'm sure, with exception to the very conservative and religious parents who think we're cool (for a divorced/blended family of course.) I never thought I would turn out to have more parenting compatibility with fundamentalist Christians, but it seems to be that way.
We live in an allotment, and I HATE it. SD unfortunately managed to find the least supervised kids to be best friends with. UGH. She recently took up with a very respectful and focused girl on her basketball team, who actually mentioned in front of us that she didn't like the girls that SD hangs out with because she's "not into their drama. I don't need a BF, I just want to focus on my sports and school."
I wanna adopt her!
Anyway...hope the sleepover went well. SD is having her sweet but in trouble often friend over New Year's Eve. This is the girl who sneaked a 16 yo into her bedroom for oral sex last summer, as well as sneaks out in the middle of the night all the time. So now I feel better that I can at least turn on the new ADT and make sure they don't leave!
Goodluck! "Om Tare Tutare Ture Mama Ayurpunye Jnana Putin Kuru Svaha"
~Sita Tara Mantra
LOL....
Not to make light of your post...but I chuckled a little because...it was funny that you called yourself your mother. That's fine I see my moms way in my actions and reactions too. But it could have been worse....your hubby could have called you your moms name!!! LOL that is bad bad bad!!
But I truly luv when my kids have their friends over, because I like to know who and what their up too. What I hate is all the running around and last minute notice. But what I hate the most is that at times bd will say....I asked you Monday and you said it was ok! But with me....I can't remember whether or not the question ever was asked in the first place......
My motto: friends welcome at all times to see me.....make an appointment if you want to see my house....
Stepwitch
Thank you Disney for portraying a positive image on all stepmothers!!!!
It all went well :)
most of my trepidations were unfounded, just something new and unfamiliar making me insecure. We all went out for pizza and then the three girls disappeared into SD's room, and that was the end of that. My only issue is that b/c the internet is down on SD's computer (a point I considered fixing before they arrived but thought the better of it) they decided at about 9:00 to use my computer in my study, just outside our bedroom door. I have told SD she could use this specific computer many times in the past, but always on specific occasions, not a general thing and she did not ask. There was quite a bit of giggling going on, so who knows what they were looking at, but they stopped before 10:30, when I was going to have FH tell them to knock it off.
I was however, unhappy with the fact that they DELETED the history of whatever they did. These two girls are 16 yrs old (SD is 14 though almost 15) and I know SD wouldn't know how to do that on the computer. They weren't on long enough to get into any serious trouble (my biggest issue being chatting with unknown people). Both of the girls were polite while they were here, and their mother picked them up at 10:00 am the next morning (thankfully, I didn't want to deal with a whole day) but I think next time I'm disabling the internet on both of the two desktops and taking my laptop into our bedroom (which I did this last time too). I guess both the girls have iphones, so if they really want to surf, they can do it on that...
It was pretty funny though, FH thought the girls would want to play scrabble or a board game with us and watch movies. I laughed and told him no WAY would that be the case, they're going straight into her room and we won't hear from them again. LOL he REALLY should trust me to know the ways of the teenage girl!
"Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." Albert Einstein
That's funny.....
gave me laugh for today. BF didn't REALLY think they would just "hang out" with you guys did he?
You should have asked him if he would have "hung out" w/his parents at 15 & 16. LOL
Glad they didn't drive you mad though. Teenage girls have a tendency to do that!