The holidays and how they tend to bring out the worst in people
As some of you know, I went solo to Detroit to spend the holidays with my daughter and family, DH stayed here in Colorado because it was his year for stepdevil, even though the brat's been ignoring him for months.
My trip went great. Spent a LOT of one-on-one time with my girl, did a LOT of shopping (ahhh the joys of teenage girls) and listened to a shitload of her music played at very high volume in the rental car (my ears are STILL ringing!)
All was well until my mother (whom we were staying with, along with my crazy Aunt Pam and quiet uncle Glen) went crazy one night and started screaming at us for my daughter leaving her wet snow boots on the wood floor. Long story, but she crossed the line and my girl and I left at 2AM to stay in a hotel. That was Friday the 28th and I haven't heard a word from mother since.
Anyhow, poor DH didn't get even a phone call or text from stepdevil and spent Xmas eve alone in our apartment drinking himself into a stupor (he DOESN'T drink much at all and I've never seen him drunk in the 2 yrs we've been together). I felt horrible for him. Plus, his brother said he wasn't being a good enough father and that's why stepdevil is ignoring him, so now DH and his brother aren't speaking. DH's back has also been giving him Hell due to an old injury that has flared up again so not only was he missing me, but dealing with family drama and a whole lot of pain on top of it. He was miserable.
I got home to Denver on Sunday morning. DH was waiting at the airport with a dozen red striped roses and tears in his eyes. So happy to be home, but missing my girl already. I do have a feeling that pretty soon she's going to get fed up living with her dad though and ask to move in with us.
Anyhow, this is really the first time I've had a chance to come back here and spend any length of time. Our NYE was spent at home with a fire in the fireplace, glass of wine, champagne toast at midnight and watching the ball drop on tv. It was perfect 
I hope everyone did ok here during the holidays. I'm about to pen my mother a nice, long letter explaining how her calling her own granddaughter names, shouting obscenities at both of us and literally losing her shit has affected me and how I'll likely not be reaching out to her anytime soon. My daughter has no desire to see her anymore either. She'll turn 15 next month and guaranteed my mother will call her, but she said she's going to ignore it. This woman has done such things before and clearly stepped over the line this time. UGH! Holidays! LOL
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Comments
He would've, like he did last
He would've, like he did last year, but he wanted to try again with stepdevil.
My mother has major issues. Abusive childhood, abusive string of husbands (not my dad, but subsequent ones), back surgery resulting in pain and abuse of pain meds and alcoholism to name a few.
She was drinking when she had her little tirade. I knew it would happen because she's miserable and needs to take it out on someone. I am just grateful it happened on my 2nd to the last day of being there instead of earlier!
I'm sorry!!!! That sucks
I'm sorry!!!! That sucks ass.
He cried when I hugged him at
He cried when I hugged him at the airport. He said he'd never spend that amount of time away from me again.
The holidays are the ONLY
The holidays are the ONLY time I get to travel though. I have my daughter here in CO during spring break and summer and christmas is the only time I can travel to Michigan to see everyone.
Mom isn't "old" really. She's 56. I'm 40. She had me 9 days after she turned 16. She is used to my daughter (who isn't high energy by any means, since she's almost 15) because she picks her up and spends one weekend a month with her.
Mom was fine last year, due to having constant distraction of my aunt, uncle and their family. This year, they all left on xmas eve, leaving mom basically alone with us. She likes to sit up drinking all night and sleep all day, whereas my girl and I would rather go to bed around midnight, get up at 8 and be out doing things all day. Mom has chronic back issues and is on pain meds so she can't spend long periods of time in the car. My daughter and I love to drive.
I knew it was going to happen, her blowing up, because we hadn't been around her much. She used the wet boots as a catalyst and then went from there. Screaming my daughter was disrespecting her and my aunt's home (even though we were sure to clean the kitchen, living room and our shared bedroom every single morning before we left for the day). It was just her being her and on alcohol and pain meds...taking out her anger and misery on us because we were happy.
Welcome back!!! I was
Welcome back!!! I was wondering what happened. That sucks that she had to ruin the trip for you. At least you got to spend some quality time with your daughter, she must have loved it!! Your DH is always so sweet to you. He must be so happy to have you home finally. I'm sure one day your DD will want to come live with you. Maybe when shes older and graduates hs.
I'm sure your mother realized she was wrong and maybe she feels guilty and thats why she is being silent. Its so hard to deal with that. My ex was an alcoholic and nothing was ever his fault. There is just no reasoning with them sometimes.
Welcome back and happy new year!!
Thanks! Yeah, it was fun
Thanks! Yeah, it was fun with my girl. So glad we got good quality time in before mom had her drunken tirade.
Anyhow, I'm halfway into the letter I'm writing to her and already 2 pages in. I haven't said half of what I want to say but the words are coming smoothly and quickly. I am not sure I'll send it or if I'll just get it all out on paper and toss it.
Happy New Year to you as well! Hope your holidays were awesome!
Glad you had fun with your
Glad you had fun with your girl, FDH's mom puled my hair while drunk and on pain meds (she hides it) it wasn't horrible but it's still just f'd up, doesn't matter if it hurt it's the point. I forgive her but I will never put myself in that situation again. Sorry that happened. It's disappointing
I am over her and her drunken
I am over her and her drunken antics actually. I'll just fly my daughter to Denver every other Christmas from now till she's 18. When I do go up, I'll find someone else to stay with.
Sucks, but I'm not subjecting myself or my minor daughter to my mother's misery any longer!