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Another day waiting

sam's picture

Submitted by sam on Thu, 07/03/2008 - 7:56am

I am still here for the 2nd day now supposed to wait around until ss decides to call to pick him up.My husband asked me this morning before he left for work what i was doing today i said waitinf for a phonecall AGAIN....He didnt say anything about it.He was suppose to phone me back yesterday and come home but he never phoned back.So i went out to run some errands for ss he was supposed to pick up report card from school that he knew about but didnt think was important obviosly.This happens often and last time i asked husband to speak to his kids and let them know that it is disrespectful for me to drive to pick them up sit in traffic on the highway for an hour and them not be there he talked to ss that tried to blame it on me saying i told him another time and sd was on a bus going to a mall with her friends while i sat there trying to track them down.My bioson had to sit there trying to get a hold of her on her cell phone and then had the gall to ask if i could come back the next day.My husband never spoke to her about that incident and half the time we go to pick her up she is still in bed at 12:00 and we have to sit and wait for her till she gets ready.Plus it costs alot of gas money to drive there and back we have a expedition which is a pig on gas..When she comes here i dont know if ss does it but i caught her writing our license plates down to give to her mother she told me that her mom didnt know we had 2 vehicles.So i told my dh and he said that he has nothing to hide so why get mad about it.Well it is my life to and i dont like people meddling in it thank you very much especially ex wife.I can tell stories about what has went on in our life to make you sick to your stomach...

Comments

sam's picture

Submitted by sam on Thu, 07/03/2008 - 8:48am

Every year that goes by we dont know who is moving in or moving out that is frustrating.With my bioson he lives with us for one year and his dad for 1 year we have a set schedule for my son so he gets the best of both worlds.But my skids you never know whos coming and whose going.

sarahbernheart's picture

Submitted by sarahbernheart on Thu, 07/03/2008 - 8:52am

can make the change sam
my FH does not expect me to be available whenever his kids need to come over or need something done.
it is unfair for you to have to sit around and wait for selfish kids (not yours!!!!!!!!!) to decide when they are ready.
and until you make a stand it will not change for the better.

"Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without one."

sam's picture

Submitted by sam on Thu, 07/03/2008 - 8:55am

I just dont know how to speak up i am not one that likes to argue i like peace i think i am scared to say something because i dont want anyone hating me.

frustratedinMA's picture

Submitted by frustratedinMA on Thu, 07/03/2008 - 9:05am

I would have refused to drive back the next day. I would have told them they missed their chance. As for the sd not waking up til you get there.. I would call when you are a half hour out and tell them they had BETTER be ready.

I recently bought a new car and the ex was PISSED.. mind you, I use my car for work.. she has a car she uses for recreation as she doesnt really work. PT occassionally.. she is notorious for losing jobs, because I think of her STELLAR personality!

sarahbernheart's picture

Submitted by sarahbernheart on Thu, 07/03/2008 - 9:21am

but respect.
you should be getting respect and not be used as a maid/taxi service.

"Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without one."

Lace Lady's picture

Submitted by Lace Lady on Thu, 07/03/2008 - 12:22pm

I used to be the person that kept my mouth shut because I wanted to keep the peace. All that did was enable everyone around me to do destructive things, & I lost every one of those friendships now that I think about it. Was it worth it to sacrifice myself & keep the peace so I could keep my friendships? Um, no. All I got was taken advantage of & steam rolled, & I lost everything I was trying to hold onto anyway.
I at least learned something... it's not always worth it to keep the peace, & I am entitled to just as much respect as I give to others. I also learned something that I think you really need to look into...
BOUNDARIES. It's a book, I forgot the author but look it up. It's okay to let people walk all over to a limit. You have to learn to set the limits & how to enforce them. Staying quiet to keep the peace is not worth it. Sometimes you have to open your mouth & put your foot down in order to keep the true peace. People can get upset. They'll get over it.
BTW - I don't wait for people anymore. I give you one chance & if you don't have the decency to call me then you've blown it. It's called common courtesy, & I expect it. You should too.