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O/T Has anyone seen or heard one? What do you think would be a good one?

slice_of_slife's picture

Submitted by slice_of_slife on Tue, 04/29/2014 - 9:47am

I just heard a Mother's day commercial instructing listeners to get flowers for all the moms in their lives- mothers, grandmothers, wives, sisters. The one I didn't hear was stepmoms. Maybe our society is so enlightened that it goes without saying. Maybe it is a sign of how outdated (or new to the situation) I am that I even noticed it. Running it through my head, it seems as if it would sound pretty contrived. Maybe something like, "Oh yeah, don't forget your stepmom , she's probably doing her best under the circumstances."

I am new to step-life, and this is DW's first Mother's Day as a stepmom. She loves my bios, even DS16, who isn't always that loveable. She deserves a lot more than we can give her, but she will be getting something for sure.

So has anyone heard stepmom mentioned in a Mother's Day commercial, or would that be insulting to stepmoms in general? Also, how would you envision stepmom being included in said commercial?

Comments

BadFairyII's picture

Submitted by BadFairyII on Tue, 04/29/2014 - 10:13am

What a great question. I think it definitely could be insulting, depending upon how the subject is handled. In my situation, equating or comparing my role to that of a mother would have been uncomfortable and unnatural. I really wanted to have kids and couldn't so trying to include me in mothers day is just one more painful reminder of the life I never got.

I also didn't have any influence my H's child while he was being raised. So, I just wasn't a "mom" figure.

I would want a separate commercial entirely.

bearcub25's picture

Submitted by bearcub25 on Tue, 04/29/2014 - 10:25am

BM hasn't spent a Mothers Day with her kids in 5 years.....or just told DSO to keep them until the 6pm switch (when she was CP).

Last year, we were awoken at 8am by BM calling and screaming at DSO to come get his kid (yes, her bio too) bc skid called Mom a name.

tryingmom's picture

Submitted by tryingmom on Tue, 04/29/2014 - 2:49pm

Ya, the BM in our situation doesn't want her kids on Mother's Day. The skids will be at our home and they won't tell me "Happy Mother's Day".

slice_of_slife's picture

Submitted by slice_of_slife on Tue, 04/29/2014 - 10:33am

So, in the spirit of ST's m.o., a separate Stepmom's Day. Where BM(s)-fill in your own unflattering descriptors here- pulls up and the kids evacuate the house, leaving behind their messes and running past SM like she was a coatrack on the way to piling in the car and leaving without even an acknowledgement. Can't see much of a marketing hook here, unless it is SM giving BM a gas card for her trouble.

thinkthrice's picture

Submitted by thinkthrice on Tue, 04/29/2014 - 11:03am

I was watching "Antique Roadshow" and an elderly woman trotted out several pieces of what she thought were "costume" jewelry. Turns out they were owned by stepgranny. She related how "everyone in the family HATED her" (and mind you this was back in the day where SM didn't have to deal with the BM who either assumed room temperature or ran off, leaving kiddies with biodad)

Turns out the jewelry was genuine with beautiful stones worth six figures.

Still not a kind word about stepgranny who had long since passed away. Appraiser said something like "I guess she wasn't so evil after all!" And they both chuckled awkwardly.

Tuff Noogies's picture

Submitted by Tuff Noogies on Tue, 04/29/2014 - 11:14am

this is so sad!

i've never seen a MD or FD commercial include steps.

i guess i'm one of the lucky few who have (fairly good) skids who have always acknowledged me on MD. ^_^ not rubbing it in. i feel sad for those who have given so much and just get passed over.

thinkthrice's picture

Submitted by thinkthrice on Tue, 04/29/2014 - 11:15am

Camera zooms in on a small child learning to tie shoes--camera pans back to catch a smiling woman behind child saying "see, you did it all by yourself!" Camera pans back further to show dad sitting in his recliner.

Next shot of child coming in the door from a torrential rainstorm holding a small valise, dressed in shorts and flip flops, the woman changes child into dry, weather appropriate clothes.

Third shot shows child grown up to pre-teen flipping off woman and yelling "I'm going back to MY house!" at a sad, pathetic biodad as almost grown child storms out the door.

Then a voiceover "There's no need for gratitude--it's only stepmom."

slice_of_slife's picture

Submitted by slice_of_slife on Tue, 04/29/2014 - 11:24am

"...assumed room temperature..." Haha.

Nice story. I wonder how many generations that jewelry will be handed down before the story that it came from a hated step relative will stop following it. A few generations ago Stepgranny probably wasn't worried all that much that all the kids (step and bio) running around didn't fall with adoration at her feet. If she somehow heard the comments about her, I am guessing she just shrugged and kept moving. The timeless, universal stepparent skill.

SunshineAndRainbows's picture

Submitted by SunshineAndRainbows on Tue, 04/29/2014 - 12:08pm

I was a Skid from age 7 on. I suppose I was lucky (or raised to be appreciative...what a concept!) because I had/have GREAT step parents. I always acknowleged them on mothers/fathers day with at least a "happy whatever day", but usually a card, gift, flowers, something for the garden, etc. They were raising me. Heck, my step dad still is and I'm 30, lol. My mother wouldn't have let us look past him like a nobody, because he wasn't and we certainly did not view him that way.

Having said that... I don't even get acknowleged on my birthday by my SS. So I won't be holding my breath on mothers day. Which is fine because I wouldn't want to be the maker of a child like that. Blum 3

Mercury's picture

Submitted by Mercury on Tue, 04/29/2014 - 1:57pm

I'm really glad that mother's day falls on our skid weekend this year. That means we will be kid free on Sunday at the very least, if I'm lucky we will dump them off on Saturday evening (afternoon???, lol).

If either of those skids ever dared to acknowledge me on that day I would give them a deadpan stare and just walk away. I'm not a mother. If I had to pick a kid to mother for a day, I'd choose a random kid off the street in my neighborhood over either of those two. Not to mention, if DH's kids ever did anything for me any day of the year it would be forced, fake, or sarcastic. Thanks but no thanks.

slice_of_slife's picture

Submitted by slice_of_slife on Tue, 04/29/2014 - 2:01pm

Thanks for all the replies. I knew that there would be a variety of responses, and I am not surprised to hear that many people want to be simply left in peace with their biokids and/or SOs. Unfortunately, not every child has a BM that wants to spend Mother's Day with them, and those children are in a tough spot. (I am a huge proponent for children being responsible for their behavior, but some situations - and some parents - just suck.) I did not consider those people who may be stepparents and not bioparents (for whatever reason), and that this topic may be particularly sensitive for them. ((hugs to you)) Congrats to those of you with skids that treat you at least fairly on Mother's Day. It is interesting to hear from all of you the different SM viewpoints about Mother's Day and all the sentimental trappings that go with it. May your Mother's Day bring you whatever you wish for, as much as that is possible, at least for one day.