So my husband's father & stepmother came up yesterday. They're here for at least a week. They have a huge motor home (or whatever they're called) & are staying at a camp ground a few minutes from our house. I really like them both, so that's not the issue. The issue is that every year they come up & we have no plans on what we're doing while they're here. It's really awkward.

My main concern is food -- we're vegetarians & they like to have meat at almost every meal. Not a huge deal, but we run into snags on what to make. Add to this that I'm super tired at times & we've had some really hot & humid days...I certainly don't want to be working for hours in our un-air conditioned kitchen! My husband & I would prefer to maybe go out for dinner every other night or so with them & on the off nights just do our own thing for dinner & meet up either before or after for snacks/dessert. I think my husband plans on telling them that tomorrow. It's just too much stress right now to come up with a meal for everyone. I know that his SM must feel the same way.

Another issue is not knowing if we're doing something with them or not, when, both of them, etc. My husband's SM sometimes gets kind of weird & opts out of activities. I don't know if she just has stuff to do or if she gets mad or what. Last year when they came up, we took them to a museum with SD9 & former SD11. (It's a museum with several buildings with different themes, a ship, a lighthouse, etc. It's on several acres.) I thought that the grandparents would enjoy something like that with the kids. Well, when we got to the museum, his SM left us & went her own way! We were at this museum for HOURS & only saw his SM at lunch & then when it was time to leave. I thought it was really rude. And when we went to the ship, my husband & his father went their own way, leaving me with the kids. And the kids took off running & I had to track them down & give them an angry lecture about staying with an adult. (The ship is huge & there's a lot of people. Plus, they shouldn't be running around like that anyway.)

So this year we don't have anything planned. SD9 won't even be here until Friday evening, so they don't get time with her until then. My husband was thinking that his dad was going to help him finish up the work on our bedroom, but his dad seems more interested in doing work outside our house. Which really, is fine with me because my husband is already second-guessing his plans for the bedroom. (They tell him how they do things & he changes his mind, meanwhile my dad gives helpful tips & advice & he's intruding. Ah, the fun of in-laws!) His dad is set on cleaning our garage, which I'm a little scared of. See, my husband & I are the types that consider the environment when we do things. For example, the previous homeowner left behind some stuff, which I plan on cleaning up & selling at yard sales. I've already sold a bunch of this stuff. And that's money in our pockets, which we definitely need! I know my husband's father will just want to throw stuff in the trash (which we'd have to haul to the dump & pay for). So I have to make sure that doesn't happen. Plus, we're putting all our junk wood from the construction in brush piles in the woods. There, it'll rot & creatures can live in the piles. (We have 10.5 acres, so I don't mind a few giant brush piles here & there.) I've heard his SM mention more than once making a burn pile to get rid of it all. And I heard my husband almost agreeing to it, despite the fact that he was the one who talked me into putting it in the woods. Arg!!!

It's just little stuff, but still. We just do things differently, that's all. I think the thing that upset me yesterday was his SM asking me about the BM situation as soon as my husband & his dad left the room. I had been looking forward to talking with her about it because a ton as happened since we saw them last summer. But when his SM mentioned the whole paternity issue, she was adamant that SD9 is my husband's. I thought she meant that after all these years, SD9 was his daughter despite what a paternity test shows. But no, she meant that she's 100% sure that SD9 is his biological daughter. Period. (His SM is very no-nonsense.) She did not like the idea of having a paternity test done. After giving it some thought, I started to wonder if she feels this way because she thought this was her granddaughter from birth. And if she finds out now that she's not, she's going to feel betrayed, as if she shouldn't have treated SD9 so well all these years. (It was obvious that his SM did not like having former SD11 around. She despised that child. She has told me many times that my husband should have never taken care of her for so long, which I partially agree with. Not because I didn't like former SD11, but because that arrangement turned BM into a monster.)

Today, my husband & his father went to Home Depot & other manly stores. lol. His SM stayed at the motor home & didn't want to interact with us. I went to my parents' house for a few hours & came back feeling a lot better. I am thankful every day for the parents & brothers that I have!!! And I make sure to tell them that! I mean, despite our differences, I love my husband's family, however, you could not have two more different families. My parents have been married for over 30 years & we're all very close-knit. My husband's parents have been divorced since he was around 14. They're both remarried & everyone lives super far apart. My husband doesn't even speak with his parents or siblings very often. So different from what I'm used to!

Anyway, just needed to vent. We'll see what tomorrow brings. We're meeting them for brunch. I'm sure the week will get better!