Yep, we actually had a great day and they are being really sweet. Both have said all day that they are really anxious about their mom's house because she told them that because she is "poor" they might not be able to afford food and will have to eat from the garden! I was up early 'cause of insomnia and heard them in the bathroom whispering and promptly began to eavesdrop. They started talking really loudly and it turned out they were arguing and SS11 was trying to convince SS5 that their mom would be okay if they lived with us and not her. SS11 said, "I want to eat food and i'm scared that we won't have food at moms. It's gotten really bad, ---, I hate living with mom and want to live with dad and stepmadre." He was terrified and on the verge of tears and I seriously didn't know whether to cry myself or punch something! I can't believe that horrible, witch of a woman! She deliberately scares her kids in order to try to get something from H. She told them that on purpose, I have absolutely no doubt, hoping it would get back to H and he would feel guilty and swoop in and rescue her from her financial catastrophe. SS11 went on saying the same stuff to SS5, who just sounded terrified and kept whining, "I wanna stay with dad too, don't leave me with mom" over and over again. I am seriously getting upset just writing about this, but am too upset not to. SS11 finished his conversation by saying, "I don't know about you, but i'm not moving with mom to ---, i'm staying with dad and stepmadre." I finally interrupted at this point and asked them if they wanted to talk or were worried about anything and SS11 just blurted it all out to me and started crying. I saw this terrified kid, whispering in his bathroom with his brother because he is worried that his mom won't be able to feed him and they will be reduced to eating from her trashy backyard???!!!!!! This was probably the most upsetting thing I have witnessed so far with BMs total lack of basic compassion for her own children. She is a complete disgrace for a human being and a "mother." I am shaking mad over this. H is really upset too, but we both had a long talk with both skids and told them that we will never let them go hungry and that their mom cannot just take them and move without going through the courts (we didn't mention that if she is reduced to eating dandelions from her yard that she probably won't be able to afford one of the nicer cardboard boxes under the best bridges in her chosen city of the week). We gave them a really nice, relaxing and fun day and tried to make everything as cozy and comforting as possible.

BM is trying to get a reaction out of us through them and must be getting desperate. She also gave SS5 a dollar bill and told him to save it for food because they might need it later!!!! She wants this to upset H to the point where he gives her more CS, but what she isn't expecting is that we've been prepared for her falling apart like this and will swoop in. With lawyers to get full custody! She has shown repeatedly that she doesn't care how much she scares her own kids and fills them with fear and instability as long as she is pushing her own agenda. If she can't feed the kids, we are not giving her more money, we are using the money to pay for the skids needs and pay our lawyer fees to have them so they don't have to live in fear of starvation/a grass diet and actually be taken care of.

I was shaky all day because I was upset, but we pulled it together and the skids have completely calmed down and are reassured for the moment. It's up to H to make the decision on what to do with this, but at the first sign of serious neglect or abuse, we will be all over it before she can even blink. Anyway, on the positive side the skids are doing really, really well. I had no idea they were picking up on as much as they are (i've never heard SS11 be so adult sounding and smart as when he was desperately whispering with SS5). Btw, they were whispering because they were trying to be quiet, not because they were trying to have a secret conversation, just wanted to point that out! I am really beginning to see more and more that almost all of their behavior problems in the past and some of the stuff we still deal with are due to BM and her horrific "parenting."

Sorry to have such a depressing post guys, thanks for the positive comments! I'm trying to focus on the positive as much as possible. Sigh...

"If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they will kill you." ~Oscar Wilde