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Question for Dads with EOWe custody

Stepmama2321's picture

Submitted by Stepmama2321 on Wed, 08/26/2020 - 4:32pm

For dads with EOWe custody of their young children (or anyone with insight on this subject) -

Do you not feel like a true parent to your child(ren) that you have only EOWe? In comparison to you child(ren) that you have full time? Is there a difference? I'm not saying you love one over the other AT ALL but do you feel differently, if that makes sense. Is the way you parent different? Discipline, your bond, etc. This is an anonymous site so answer honestly.

Comments

shellpell's picture

Submitted by shellpell on Wed, 08/26/2020 - 9:02pm

My dH has given up on being any kind of real or lasting influence on SS12 who is long distance and has been for the past five years. BMs influence is too strong. Of course he loves SS but he admitted he feels differently and closer to our two kids. He is happy that we are mostly on the same page when it comes to parenting whereas he and BM are opposites. dH can't stand seeing BM and her characteristics in SS. Me and our two kids are his top priority.

strugglingSM's picture

Submitted by strugglingSM on Wed, 08/26/2020 - 9:52pm

My DH definitely feels marginalized as a parent and as if he's missed out on a lot. That said, Skids are also partially-alienated and BM is a control freak who keeps a lot of info from DH, so it's not just the EOWE thing. Presumably, if BM actually treated him like a co-parent, maybe DH would feel less marginalized. When I met him, he had been divorced for almost 3 years. BM was already remarried and had the Skids call her new husband "Dad". They would say things about "our parents" or "our dad" in front of DH and they were not referring to him.