Halloween with US this year!
When DH went to pick up Ched on Friday he told BM that he would be picking up Ched on Halloween day at 3pm and returning him at 9pm. She said, "Oh, well, I wanted to take him trick-or-treating this year."
He said, "It is MY year and *I* am going to take him."
Later he asked Ched if he wanted to go TorT with him or w/ BM. He said, "With BM." DH asked Ched why. He said, "Coz you don't LIKE going trick-or-treating."
DH was flabbergasted. He told Ched, "I never ever said that. Mommy's always taken you, and this year I am so excited to take you out to go T-or-T'ing."
So tonight as we were taking Ched back to BM's, I mentioned Halloween. I told him, "Six nights of sleeping at mommy's until we get to go T or T'ing! Daddy and I are SO excited to go with you this year...what do you want to be?" He mentioned being a pirate, so I'm gonna go look for a Pirate costume for him this week.
As we dropped off Ched, I said to BM, "Okay, we'll see Charlie on Saturday at 3pm." She didn't say a word, just slammed the front door.
Hubby has NEVER EVER had the opportunity to take his son T-or-T'ing. She's NEVER let him, she always goes out with her kids and makes him stay at home. I found this out a couple weeks ago and that's why I've been SO insistant on hubby doing this this year. Ched is going on 7 y.o. and never gone T-or-T'ing with his daddy? I find that really sad.
And I mentioned something to hubby..."HEY, you know what would really get HER goat? Going T-or-T'ing in HER neighborhood!" Oh yeah, that would really piss her off, which, I used to Never want to be spiteful, but she just brings it out in me!!
I'm excited about next Saturday...even DH and I might dress up with Ched! 
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We usually all go, BM, me,
We usually all go, BM, me, BF, the kids, and we meet up with a group. This year she has to work so we'll be doing our own thing which is exciting. Even though going Trick or Treating along with the BM isn't on my top favorite things to do, whenever I think about when I was a kid I never had to choose between my parents. That pressure wasn't on me b/c my parents were never divorced. I try to imagine what it would be like as a child trying to choose between my parents and I'm soooooo thankful I was never put in that situation. Whenever I find myself not really into being around BM during certain occassions, I think about how I would feel as a child choosing between my parents and it helps to put things in perspective.
While some situations don't work out that way, I would have never asked the child who he wanted to go with. Just simply say: "Son, Me and Stepmom2Ched get to take you Trick or Treating this year, and I'm sooooo excited to do so!". And leave it at that.
Please don't take away his childhood by putting him in the middle of adult situations.
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“Unless commitment is made, there are only promises and hopes; but no plans.”
This will be our first year
This will be our first year with skids for Halloween too and I am so excited!!! We are actually going to a haunted house instead of the usual TorT, and we already brought their costumes
Thankfully BM does good with
Thankfully BM does good with alternating and sharing holidays. Last yr, she had them even though WE bought the outfits. This yr it fell on her wkd but DH asked to switch wkds and she was fine with that. We again bought their costumes. I think that your DH should have the opportunity to take HIS son TorT if he wants to do so. Bm has convinced SS that DH doesnt like it and this yr, you will get to prove that wrong!