If he will really go with you to your next appointment (is that the intent? a couples session?) it may prove to be very beneficial.

Your DH acknowledged MILs bad behavior but did nothing about it.  Much like everything else.  It is definitely something to discuss in therapy if it's meant to be a couples session.  

I don't know if he is simply that conflict avoidant, if he only says what he thinks you want him to say while wholeheartedly believing something else, or if he's so loose in his convictions that they change based on who is bending his ear in any given moment.

To be able to define that would be huge for you in determining how much, if any, more effort you're willing to put into this marriage.

Keep in mind, though, that therapy sessions are for you and his participation is not needed.  

As for your MIL?  Victim mentality is not much of a surprise for a boundary stomping self declared matriarch.  She must have misinterpreted your wedding as something other than leave and cleave.  She expects that your behavior is to mirror that of your DH - she raised him that way, afterall.  That you don't isn't a failure on your part despite that she'd have others believe it so.  

Apparently you being a witch and giving her anxiety didn't prevent her from rearranging your home..smdh.

Your DH is mealy mouthed agreeing that his mom oversteps but he does zero about it when she is there.  I would inform him that in the future, she is not welcome as a guest in your home.  She can stay at a hotel next time.

I wouldn't be above sending her a follow up to her stay note.

Dear MIL,

I understand from DH that you did not enjoy your recent unanounced visit to my home.  I'm sorry that you think that I am a witch and that you experienced anxiety throughout your stay.  Unfortunately, I do believe that these feelings are mutual.  I was actually surprised you had time for anxiety between rearranging my home and throwing out my belongings.  In order for you to not suffer these same feelings on future visits to see your son and his children, I have included a list of local accomodations that will be of use as staying with us just isn't an option.  I hope you understand that this is for everyone's mental health and comfort.

Sincerely,

wicked sm of the West.

My DH said that she just sticks her nose where it doesn't belong.

So your H states the obvious but still allows his mother to cross boundaries. I really don’t understand that logic. At this point to heck with your MIL, she can go kick rocks and never enter your home again but your H is a real piece of work. Always digging his head in the sand and doesn’t say or do anything to back you up, his WIFE. I don’t even know how you want to be intimate with him….he needs to go and get his b@lls back from his mother because he’s all talk and no action and I mean that literally.