Daily swimming lessons.
Ok guys, sick of me yet? Here is another issue I would like your opinions on.
Bm has enrolled munchkin into daily swimming lessons. They are about 45 min a day and I believe they happen at our supper time. 530pm. Bm has invited Dh to come and watch munchkin.
I don't really think that he should.
Here's why:
1. He will get to "see" munchkin but not interact with her. She will be in her lessons, so if he is getting attention from her then she is not paying attention to her lesson.
2. He (or we) would have to sit with Bm as there is really only one viewing area.
3. The last time she was in swimming lessons he insisted we not miss one of them. It became a hassle and also caused tension between us and the other family. They don't like to hear us talk about munchkin as if we have anything to do with her.
4. I was not invited.
5. Wouldn't it be confusing for her to have her mom and dad suddenly start hanging out together everyday without me?
There are a few reasons why he should go like:
1. Its more time near munchkin
2. He would get to take pride in his daughter
3. He would probably have a better idea of how things are going for bm in her life, which could limit crazy surprises.
Idk girls. What do you think? What would you do?
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Comments
She's usually not to bad. I
She's usually not to bad. I wouldn't be surprised if she doesn't stay at the window, and goes for coffee or something instead.
There is no end recital for this. I would expect Dh to go to a recital! We have a dance one coming soon! I think once or twice a week would be a good idea as well. We'll see when we talk about it more.
They could split the days on
They could split the days on who takes her? You could even go one day too! You and him together one day! JUST him (not BM) one or two days - and then JUST BM the rest of the days? Work out a schedule? Of course BM does not need to know you may be attending one or two days with DH? What about something like that?
That sounds like a great
That sounds like a great idea. I don't think she would mind me being around, its me thats got the issues really. Its something we're working on.
do you even want to go???
do you even want to go??? in the beginning i went to all the shit mil planned for skids (bm plans nothing) ---- mil of course invites bm.... i went just to show my presence...... but i truly freakin' hated it....
do you care if dh goes?? does he want to go??
me, personally would NOT go and neither would dh if we were stuck next to bm... we/he would go if it were on our day and bm would not be there, but if she was going to be there she would have to drop skid off afterwards...
the "watch me, watch me" shit wears me out big time
I would love to show
I would love to show Munchkin that even though I'm not around as often I still love her. I used to take her to everything!
"the "watch me, watch me"
"the "watch me, watch me" shit wears me out big time"
Sorry, that made me laugh and and choke on my coffee.
My opinion - it's good for
My opinion - it's good for the kid to see that the parents support their activities. If it's uncomfortable for them to watch together - take turns and I think you should go. I went to SD's games (soccer, basketball and such) - BM was there - we didn't sit together but we supported SD and I think that she appreciated it.
Glynne
I love to do things with Sd,
I love to do things with Sd, but really the swimming lessons seemed to be just an interrogation thing last time. I had to take sd for two weeks while her dad worked because the schedual was different in the summer. I'd bring her and get her ready and take her in the pool, she was SOOOO proud to show off her step-mom lol. But then I'd come out and get the prying small talk from bms family, because they make this a huge family thing where grandma and grandpa are there and even an aunt or two sometimes. They would judge me and make comments about her hair, her suit, her goggles, her swimming diaper (which I dont agree with) and just about anything else they could. Infront of all the other parents. Dh hated it when it was his turn to go because they did this to him too, but that was back in july/august. I think he forgets how terrible it was.
Okay - if you do things with
Okay - if you do things with her and DH does too. Maybe it's okay for you to opt out on this one. As long as she feels supported by you - you don't have to put up with BM's family and who are they to judge you? You sound like a good SM who cares and is trying to do the right thing. Good for you!
Glynne