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My life does not revolve around ss

Tx mommy of 3's picture

So this is kind of funny. Dh is always getting upset with me because he thinks I purposely plan things when ss isn't here. Whatever. Yes, I know when ss is coming and he's, I could plan wait and plan things when ss is here, but why? Instead, I choose to plan things when it works best for us. For ex, dh got upset because I am planning dd bday party ON her actual bday instead of a week before or a week later when ss is here. Whatever. I also planned baby's 1st bday the weekend before ss was coming. Partly because it was my dad's bday weekend and I figured I could have baby's bday AND visit dad in one weekend. Ss ended up coming anyway, but before dh was mad. EVERY time I suggest we do something the first thing out of his mouth is, "will I have ss?" GRRRR....

So here is the latest and I laughed at dh. So I see fliers all around town about the circus coming. I said, "hey, we should take the kids." dh-"will I have ss". I look on my calendar. No, we won't have him. Dh- "you always do this. You always plan things when ss isn't here." yes, dh, I planned the circus. I called Barnum and told them to come on this specific weekend. And Barnum listened. So yes, I am evil, dh. I mean seriously?!

Comments

starfish's picture

but it is awful convenient (especially if you didn't have any hand in it, like the circus) when fun stuff happens when ss isn't there, huh??? }:) }:) }:)

and what is it with them asking if it is skid w/e??? dh does the same thing ~ i damn sure know what w/e's we are sentenced to skid visits!

i know i don't plan anything on skid visit.... unless i have arranged for mil to baby sit... my reason is "they take the fun out of everything"!!

Tx mommy of 3's picture

I LOVE when things conveniently happen on non-ss weekends. It is great! My big thing anyway is that we don't have to entertain and do fun stuff every time ss comes. We don't take our bios somewhere all the time, why when ss is here? And our bios deserve to do fun stuff when ss isn't here too.

Tx mommy of 3's picture

What makes it even worse is that ss is 13!! He prides himself and says he's 13.5 (not quite). So what normal 13 yo would want to go to the same places as his 5 and 4 year old brother and sister?! What 13 yo wants to go to the circus? Oh wait...mine. It wouldn't be a problem if ss acted his age because then he'd tell his dad he didn't want to go places. But since he acts like he's 6... I hope he grows up one day!

I feel exactly like you said sourgirl. His life goes on when he leaves, so does ours. Ss isn't on my mind except the day he is supposed to arrive. Then when he leaves I don't think about him for anoter two weeks. Harsh maybe, but true. Also, if ss mom doesn't revolve her life around ss, why should I? This past year it was a big deal for ss to miss Christmas with bm and grandparents and spend it with us. First time ever. Did bm wait until ss got back to have Christmas? Nope. They had it without him because she has another kid. Life goes on.

MyLifeMyRules's picture

We went through a phase when we did things always when ss was with us. But it always ended up sucking. My girls hated going anywhere because they knew what would happen. DH woke us up early one saturday several months ago and said "Come on I need some girl time" he took us to the Aquarium and an outdoor concert and a fancy dinner. That night he decided that we had so much fun that we now plan 98% of our activities around when SS is NOT here. Something as simple as strawberry picking or an all day event like the Rodeo. We decided that we didnt want to let him make us miserable. Sure we do things with him ocassionally but we told him its now not expected its up to how he decides to act with us and apparently he mostly decides that he isnt a fan of fun because he acts like CRAP!!

MyLifeMyRules's picture

We went through a phase when we did things always when ss was with us. But it always ended up sucking. My girls hated going anywhere because they knew what would happen. DH woke us up early one saturday several months ago and said "Come on I need some girl time" he took us to the Aquarium and an outdoor concert and a fancy dinner. That night he decided that we had so much fun that we now plan 98% of our activities around when SS is NOT here. Something as simple as strawberry picking or an all day event like the Rodeo. We decided that we didnt want to let him make us miserable. Sure we do things with him ocassionally but we told him its now not expected its up to how he decides to act with us and apparently he mostly decides that he isnt a fan of fun because he acts like CRAP!!