Ugh! Another long summer?!
So last summer we had ss for our full 30 days...yea. We broke it up to 2 two-week visits and those two weeks were long for everyone. Ss didn't want to be here that long, our bios got tired of him and I was left to spend time with him because dh worked. Last hear he told me he'd use two weeks o his vacation time during the summer when ss was here. Whew, right? Nope. So now dh is saying vacation time is booked ALL summer. Really? Dh waited til now to put his dates in knowing ss was coming this summer?! I'm so mad! Dh KNOWS ss is coming but doesn't want to deal and spend time with his own kid, yet expects me to..without complaining! Why should I spend time with him when clearly dh doesn't want to? Not looking forward to this summer again!
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that sucks!!! make it boring
that sucks!!! make it boring as shit for ss and maybe he'll rethink spending 1/2 the summer with dad!
we are supposed to get skids for "two uninterrupted weeks" during the summer, i am so thankful that has never happened. but bm doesn't keep them for her "two uninterrupted weeks" either. funny how neither bio want their skids 24/7. we just do the standard visitation all year long. during summer, spring break, etc. bm's mom keeps skids during the day.
I would make him send him to
I would make him send him to camp. It isn't fair for you to have to assume dad's role. Afterall, he's coming to see his father. If you weren't there what would he do with him? Camp!
we do 3 weeks in a row with
we do 3 weeks in a row with SSs- at the end I want to kill everyone!
i'd be ready to kill after 3
i'd be ready to kill after 3 days ~ and i am eow friday night thru mon morning ~ and i'm afraid this w/e may be longer, no school fri or mon and it's our ass gnat w/e
Oh me too! We are eow fri
Oh me too! We are eow fri night-sun night. Ss uually gets to our house with dh fri hen we are asleep an they leave sun afternoon to drive two hours to take ss back. And by sat night I am SO ready! By lunchtime Sunday I'm counting down. So you can imagine my summers!
Well our CO states dh has to
Well our CO states dh has to give bm his summer dates by a certain date or else it defaults to we get him rhe entire month of June. So I'd rather not have him a full straight month. Plus it helps so that everyone involved can make plans and aren't waiting around on each other. Our co also states that the time can be broken into no more than two periods and each period has to be a minimum of 7 days. I would LOVE it of we only did 2 one week times or just keep the regular eow schedule, but we go by the CO!
Since I am a sahm and stay home with our bios of course I'm supposed to watch ss. Why should HE have to go to camp and our kids don't have to? *roll my eyes*. Plus since he is 13, it is hard to find stuff for teenagers to do. Usually camps take up to age 12.
Last summer we didn't purposely make it boring, but because I had an infant we didn't do much. So ss hated it. I know he doesn't want to spend all that time here but because that's what the co says...
You can get him into a camp
You can get him into a camp that teaches him to be a camp counselor. I bet he would like that and it would help you to not have him around all summer to entertain.
, well hopefully as he gets
:sick: , well hopefully as he gets older he'll find a bff to stay with for a few days ~ just make sure it's on your co time!!! }:)
No friends here! We live two
No friends here! We live two hours away from ss town.
even better friends in ss's
even better friends in ss's town!!!
can you send him to a ymca or something during the day?
just the thought of that much nonstop time with skids gives me the heebie jeebies
So why do you actually have
So why do you actually have to do a month? Cant your dh maybe take off a day or two and do some long weekends? Theres no law against NOT taking visitaion and if the kid doesnt want to come, you dont want to have him there, your dh didnt bother to plan ahead to ensure he'd be there-then what's the point?
On the other hand, is he trustworthy at all? Could you buy him a pass to the local pool and let him hang out there all day? Any relatives that would love to see him for a few days? Do you have any friends with kids that age you could introduce him to? A Church camp?
Summer before last ss spent a month here. Thank God I have a job and dh was home with him all day every day! I sent MY kids to camp that summer so they could have a break from him. I went walking every day after I got home from work for at least an hour. I retired to my room by 9:00 pm each night. He had a tv, dvd player, and game system in his room. Dh was recovering from surgery so I know that he was left to mostly entertain himself.
Good question. I think
Good question. I think because of the way it is worded it sounds like it eiher we choose our dates (minimum of 14 days) or we get a full month- yuck! And heaven forbid dh 'look' bad and refuse to keep his son extra time when it is handed to him.
None of ss relatives live here. All mine and dh family live in ss town. My mil wouldn't mind taking him awhile but I don't know of dh will agree to that. Ss is 13 but extremely immature. And he knows no one here. I could leave him at a pool but he wouldn't know anyone and prob would be just as bored anyway. Our church youth group camps are out of town and we don't even know when they are yet. Besides, ss doesn't know anyone at our church so it would be awkward for him and dh wouldn't allow it. We have been here 3 years and since my kids are little I haven't met a lot of people. The friends I have made thru church or my kids activities have young kids. I am going to see if the YMCA has anything for him because he was interested in that. I also need to check with dh because he has friends with sons ss age so maybe... I haven't met their sons so it all depends in how immature or mature they are. Remember, my ss was riding piggy back on my dh just a few months ago!
Also ss doesn't have his own room here. My dd and ds have heir own room and the baby is with us. We have a small house. Our kids have tv's but no cable, just hooked up to a DVD player. We have a Wii in the living room though. Last summer it was horrible because it rained/was cloudy almost 10 days straight during our first two week stint! Hopefully at leastthis time he can play outside. I'm crossin my fingers that dh sill go for the 2 7day option instead!
Wouldnt it be awesome if you
Wouldnt it be awesome if you can set a tent up in the backyard? Wouldnt that be cool for him to camp out? Your dh could join him in the evening when he gets home from work!!
i would check into your camps. My dd went to church camp when she was in 4th grade-didnt know anyone. She made friends and had a great time. Maybe if you forced ss out of his comfort zone (i.e. your living room) perhaps he would mature a little and learn how other 13 year olds act.
Yeah, I'm really hoping the
Yeah, I'm really hoping the YMCA has something for his age. And I'm hoping dh agrees to it! I'm putting my 4&5 year olds in swim lessons and maybe karate. Plus they have their church activities. So they won't even be at home all day either.
Yeah we get my BFs 17D again
Yeah we get my BFs 17D again this summer long.......yippee skippy
TELL DH THAT HIS SON IS HIS
TELL DH THAT HIS SON IS HIS RESPONSIBILITY THERE FOR DONT COOK FOR HIM DONT WASH FOR HIM DONT PAY ANY ATTENTION TO HIM GO ON IN MINDING YOUR BUISNESS IM PRETTY SURE DH WILL LEAVE WORK ASIDE AND WHEN SUMMER COMES BACK AGAIN HE'LL REMEMBER AND THINK TWICE ABOUT DOING THE SAME THING AGAIN.
I would check out the Y, and
I would check out the Y, and see if there are programs there for young teens, I would check with members of your church to see if there are any activities for kids that age. Nothing is worse than having a bored 13 year old. I know that we have my MIL "watch" my Ss when he is with us. He's now 14, and there are two reasons, he isn't real responsible within our household- for him to stay by himself here, he would have to care for 3 dogs- walking them and cleaning up if the puppy has an accident. Since the loss of my FIL, MIL needs a lot of help around her house. So he can go and help her- opposed to sit here and do nothing in my house.