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baby mama disappears every weekend thats our scheduled time.... WHAT TO DO??????

buterfly_2011's picture

Submitted by buterfly_2011 on Thu, 03/29/2012 - 1:02pm

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If my SO has scheduled parenting time with his child (every other weekend) and the BM never answers her phone....... never responds to messages and conveniently is never home when its his scheduled time. Vacations or they are out of town etc. I am ready to pull my hair out over this. Because he just says "ok" when they do call back with that excuse. She only answers her phone (when she does answer) on thursdays. WTF is that?
So what I am asking is what are his rights? Do the police get involved? How do we handle this? Last time we went to court she disappeared for 7 months. It took his attorney 7 months to locate her. I fear if he doesn't act quick he is going to miss out on very important bonding time he needs with his child. She remarried and SS3 has to call her current husband dad. I believe she wants my SO out of their lives. She has 5 kids. All different fathers. My SO is the only father who is fighting for his child and giving her support for his child.
I don't know what to do. Any ideas ladies?

Unfreakingreal's picture

Submitted by Unfreakingreal on Thu, 03/29/2012 - 1:11pm

Every time BM is missing at pick up time, your DH has to file a report with the police. Once he has THREE of those, called DIR (domestic incident report) he should go back to court and present them to the judge. BM will be found in contempt of court and could potentially even lose custody. He needs to file the reports or else he won't have a leg to stand on. This happened to my DH many years ago with BM.

buterfly_2011's picture

Submitted by buterfly_2011 on Thu, 03/29/2012 - 1:18pm

WE are going on 5 weeks now without contact with SS3. He has a CO of joint custody. Every other weekend visits and of course the holidays and summer stuff. So he needs to file a report every time she "disappears". He hasn't filed anything and this has been going on for months now. Thank you for the advice. I wasn't sure if police got involved with that type of domestic issue. Do we file with the court or our attorney or the police? I am just so sick of this rollercoaster. Last time he had her served that was when she disappeared for those 7 months. I just do not understand. All he wants is to see his son. She chose to have his baby..... now she is trying to erase him from his life? Just pure selfish if you ask me!

Unfreakingreal's picture

Submitted by Unfreakingreal on Thu, 03/29/2012 - 1:25pm

File the reports with the local PD. He needs to take the court papers when he goes to file the complaint. File one every weekend that he shows up and she's not there. After the 3rd, go to court. She'll get in deep shit trouble for that.

IAmALady77's picture

Submitted by IAmALady77 on Thu, 03/29/2012 - 1:20pm

If you have a court order, call the police on each time this happens and file kidnapping report. That's what we've had to do. I also agree with unfreakingreal, once you get 3 or more take her to court for contempt.

buterfly_2011's picture

Submitted by buterfly_2011 on Thu, 03/29/2012 - 1:31pm

He does push it that's how we know she is never home. Or doesn't answer her phone. I just was asking what we can do. We just feel like we are getting nowhere with calling and getting nothing. Driving there and they are "gone". I wasn't sure what the next step was. He isn't being a pushover we just weren't sure what the next step was.