You are here

Bridal Shower 'Conference Call' with BM, DH's sister and OSD

Disillusioned's picture

The poster here who mentioned I should back out of participating in holding the shower for YSD that I was sucked in to doing because it no matter what I did it would be something for BM, DH's sister and OSD to pick on - in other words continue with their relational aggression (bullying) towards we, couldn't have been more right!

I should have clued in when DH's sister sent a message earlier this week suggesting we conference call either Saturday or Sunday, and when I confirmed Saturday work work she then responded with "SUNDAY" in other words 'oh you would like Saturday Disillusioned, well it will be SUNDAY instead"

Anyway this morning was the 'conference call' and we were all supposed to call in to OSD's phone. So when I call, after she says hello I say Hi, and there is silence. So I sort of joked with her asking if I was the first one on the line. She says "no, Mom (BM) is on the line"

No response from BM

So, I ignore the rude lack of response from BM and politicly ask how they're doing. Silence

At this point, nothing BM, DH's sister or OSD does really faze me anymore. I was thinking "oh, come ON" Seriously, how immature are you anyway BM?!

You can't be mature enough to respond when someone says hello to you?

Sadly this shocked me though as BM has never treated me that way, but, this last year lots of games have been going on and she has changed apparently.

Very sad, for 17 of the 18 years DH and I have been together BM and I have gotten along with no major problems. The reasons I think this has changed are a whole other post!

Anyway, pathetic that BM claims to try to set OSD straight on her behaviour and teach her to show respect including for me, and yet BM was rude and guess not a surprise that OSD was/is rude too!

Then the queen of rudeness and BS comes on the line, DH's sister. So, conference call underway.

Any questions or comments I had, if addressed at all, were responded to by OSD or DH's sister - I noticed BM was silent. But she sure did make sure to joke with DH's sister, bring up stuff they had done recently in prep for the shower - like check out the facility, etc... - all stuff I had clearly been excluded from and now they all started laughing and doing the remember that, remember this with each other. Obviously they would know that could make me uncomfortable, mostly likely they were loving rubbing that in.

Funnily enough, none of it bothered me. I was strangely detached from it all. I think you get to a point where you expect people will act like assholes and you are not only not surprised when they do, but you realize you are so bored with it all you don't even care

The only good in it all is DH literally stopped everything he was doing when he realized I was off the call with them and asked how it went - I told him exactly how it went - not that it surprised him. He basically said they ware assholes, glad I took the high road and showed some class, and let's worry about the things in life that actually matter.

Good response DH!

Icansorelate's picture

So why do you still have anything to do at all with planning or hosting this shower? Heck, I would not even go- just send a gift with my "regrets".

Disillusioned's picture

Icansorelate, the purpose of this post was a vent about BM, NOT whether or not I'm participating in this shower. I honestly don't understand people who miss the whole point of a post just so they can jump on the poster

If it's really that important to you to know the answer to that, ready my previous posts about it, because I really can't be bothered to respond to something that has nothing to do with what I was venting about

Disillusioned's picture

Absolutely stepmeanie, I wasn't disagreeing with that, just that it wasn't the point of my vent.

Some people on here I find are just are so quick to jump on the poster rather than respond to what the poster is actually venting about, they get on to some irrelevant point and start to attack the poster instead....I'm really not interested in responding to people like that

At the beginning of my post I stated that I should have not participated, I have my reasons for doing so, and quite honestly don't care much about what sort of nonsense BM, DH's sister or his daughter pull. My point was they are acting as jerks, that I expect them to act that way, am so bored with this crap I'm totally detached from it, and the highlight was DH is completely onside with me and supports me in this matter - to me, THAT's progress (and was the point of my post) Smile

Disillusioned's picture

hahaha just-a-mom, yes I'm sure there is one coming. And yes, DH should have stood up to his sister and daughter a looooong time ago!

Rags's picture

Oh yes, do worry only about the things that matter. But..... rub all of their noses in their cess pool of characterless crap.

And have fun doing it.

I would. }:)

Shredding the world of the toxic morons in a blended family adventure is where the fun is. If you have to be in a toxic situation with the idiots in the circus then make them eat the shit they are serving.

Again, have fun!!!!!

Disillusioned's picture

Yes Rags, thank goodness my sister is coming to the shower with me, and she is soooooo on to their crap. She and I will have a good laugh at all their obvious pokes and insults....all stemming from their own insecure jealousies! There WILL be wine there, this should at least be highly entertaining