This is when you should have stopped him and said 'this is our date night, we can talk about SD tomorrow. I'd appreciate our night being about us'. Spending your date night listening to rattle about SD would rate up there with SD being pillow talk convo...he was being an insensitive butthead. He won't know though unless you call him out on it. No, you're not anti SD, but please could date night be uh, a date about us.

See, I'm the opposite, I think DH didn't talk about the kids enough and change the subject if I did. He's changing lately.

We go on a 5-7 day vacation each year by ourselves to celebrate our anniversary. DH always talks about ss and bd. I give him a little bit in the beginning then tell him that we deserve time to be husband and wife not just mom and dad. He knows that once I say that, he's got his 30 minute warning to wrap it up so that we can enjoy our adult time.

I know that he feels guilty about leaving the kids. But I need adult time to be his wife, not just a bm and stepmom! So he has to get over it...

Good luck

My H did something similar the other day...He started in about how disgusted he is about his adult children's ill treatment of me...i tried really hard to ignore the lead in comments such as..."I can't believe he didn't respond to your sincere email" or ...I don't even know what to think about my son... (my SS) now...on and on and on...until I finally said "Can you please stop talking about it? (I have been disengaged since May with my 3 adult sk's)...I just don't want to talk about ,or focus on them anymore..."They no longer own any real-estate in my head or my heart" I am done over investing in relationships that have had 0 return for 26 years...I am so done. He finally is getting it that I am done...but still tries to get a dialog started that offends me over again of their mis-treatment...I do not want this to become a toxic bond for my H and I...so I tell him that I have forgiven them, but I have dusted my feet off and have moved on...I have released them all to God and am trying to enjoy my life and the people around me that do love and accept me...I see the trap of constantly being pulled emotionally into something that is now considered "the past"...The adult children still try to come in between my H and I, but He is finally standing up for our marriage...By the time they figure it out, they are going to discover..I have already re-defined my life without them...