Got my feelings hurt by a 5 year old!?!?!?! Why?
So, I know that this stems from BM... and I cannot be MAD at ss5 by ANY means, but it still hurt my feelings.
We were all at home on Friday night, SS was playing in the living room while FH and I were sitting on the couch talking. Here's what happened:
ME: SS I love you!
SS: uh yuh......
FH: SS, I love you!
SS: I LOVE YOU DADDY!!!!!
ME: (teasing him) Ah, daddy gets all the energy and I get "uh yuh"...
FH: Don't you love SM?
SS: What?
FH: Don't you love SM?
SS: What?
FH: Do you love SM?
SS: WHAT?
Now, I know he is only 5.. and he was being silly...but it hurt my feelings. I have been in his life since he was 1. He has NEVER EVER had a problem telling me that he loves me, usually with a great big hug to follow. BM has been extremely insecure lately, with the "I am your REAL mommy" BS, when no one has ever told him any different. I hate that she makes him feel like it is not okay to love me. I know that is where is stems from because he is always saying "my mom says I grew in HER tummy, not yours". I never think anything of that because he is too young to know that is not something that he should share with me... all he knows is that his mom says it, and it is about me, so he tells me. But this was a diliberate "NOT saying that he loves me"... he knew what he was doing, and there is a reason WHY.
I hate that it hurts my feelings. It is not his fault his mom is CRAZY!
Double comment
Double
Oh yes...
i know how a 5 year old can hurt your feelings...
Kids can be cruel, as they lack tact...
You know what, Whenever he tells you that he didn't grow in your tummy tell him that he grew in your HEART...
~You can see clearly only with your heart. What is truly important is invisible to the eyes~ Antoine de Saint-Exupéry's
Didn't mean to hurt me...
I know he didn't mean to hurt me... I will start using that line~ I have read it several times on someones signature (can't remember who right now) and it makes me smile every time.
He normally is very mindful of my feelings, and very affectionate. I think that is probably what threw me off the most. It is just not like him to act like that. : ( I am hoping this phase doesn't last long!!
DISbelief~
~You have to BE crazy to UNDERSTAND crazy!~ ; )
I'm sure he loves you...
And he is confused due to loyalty conflicts with a BM that demands him to CHOOSE her over you... which sucks...
~You can see clearly only with your heart. What is truly important is invisible to the eyes~ Antoine de Saint-Exupéry's
My signature
Yes...since BM wants to be a b***tch and drill that into your SS's head..have a gentle talk with him and let him know that you KNOW you aren't his REAL mommy..but you love him like a REAL mommy.
Poor kid. I can't help but feel bad for these kids..they are too young to be used by BM. I'm sure this child loves you. I can understand how your feelings got hurt though. Keep your head up.
"He grew up in my heart, not my belly"
Well...
I did have a talk with him the next day and reminded him that it is okay if he loves me and I love him just as much as I love his sisters (my BD's). He understood...I guess I will just have to ride through this phase like I do every other... and see how it turns out. I am not giving up on him though. He loves me and his sisters. BM just gets into his head every once in a while, and I think it is dispicable!
DISbelief~
~You have to BE crazy to UNDERSTAND crazy!~ ; )
sometimes...
Sometimes you have to take the high road. If you are affectionate and understanding, and tell him you know how hard it must be, and that it's okay to love you both, eventually he'll hear you. Most importantly, you'll know you did the right thing. Again.