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How many of you did not have kids with you SO because of your skids?

paul_in_utah's picture

Submitted by paul_in_utah on Mon, 02/13/2012 - 2:32pm

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Just had a random thought the other day - I am really glad that I didn't have children with DW, because I do not think that she would have been able to do a good job parenting, based on how she has handled SD17. We tried for many years to have children, but were infertile. In hindsight, I am very glad that it turned out this way. Even though I would have been a "real" parent if DW and I had had children, I just can't imagine her being effective as a mother, after watching SD17 steamroll her for the last 14 years.

Has anyone else out there actually been glad that you didn't have a child with your SO? Did any of you deliberately **not** have a child, based on the way your SO raised your skids?

Auteur's picture

Submitted by Auteur on Mon, 02/13/2012 - 2:39pm

I really was too old to have kids (met GG when I was almost 42) but If I WAS child bearing I would NEVER have kids with GG as he is an OSTRICH parent. He loves to pick on my grown bios who do nothing bad to him; don't ask for money, never intrude on our lives. I feel completely traumatized/permanently emotionally scarred from his three delinquents and their PASinating, free ranging biobeotch, the Behemoth.

liks's picture

Submitted by liks on Mon, 02/13/2012 - 2:49pm

yes.....I would have had kids to my beloved....but his horrible little shits pleaded with him not to have anymore children as they didnt want any more brothers and sisters....

Truth is the jealous little shits didnt want their father directing his attention towards anything else but them....thus they are super pissed off with me cos we DONT ALLOW THE LITTLE DELINQUENT FAT BOOFS INTRUDE ON OUR LIVES ANYMORE...

WISHING I COULD BORN another 3 kids to DH...just so I could stick more pics of 'our babies' up around the house and get them fat cow's of kids off the walls....their heads make me feel sick....

Jsmom's picture

Submitted by Jsmom on Mon, 02/13/2012 - 2:51pm

DH had a vasectomy when SS was born. When we met, I would have loved to have had a child with him. But fast forward 6 years and I am so glad that it didn't happen. He is not the type of parent that I am and any child we had would have been born into conflict...

confusedmomof3's picture

Submitted by confusedmomof3 on Mon, 02/13/2012 - 3:31pm

If his kids weren't in the mix I would have loved to have a child with him. But I know all too well that those manipulative children would throw a FIT at the notion.. and they would treat the kid like shit. They already treat my biodaughter (their step sister) like crap.. I'd even fear for the babys safety.

christag's picture

Submitted by christag on Mon, 02/13/2012 - 6:13pm

I regret not having kids with DH. I think it would have made us more of a family. I wasn't really given a choice. His kids didn't react well to him dating so he had a vasectomy before we got engaged. At the time, I wasn't really allowed an opinion, but I guess it was an indication of how things were going to go.

bananashake's picture

Submitted by bananashake on Mon, 03/05/2012 - 6:59am

Being with my BF (has two kids aged 3 and almost 5) has been paramount in my decision to be child-free. And we don't even live together.

For one, I do not agree with his "discipline" tactics and I know him and I would butt heads constantly.

Two, I have minimal responsibilities towards his kids as we do not live together. If I had a child with him, I'd be raising not one but 3 kids as he would expect way more responsibility from me.....jumping off a cliff sounds more appealing.

Three, the same irks and annoyances from his kids would no doubt come from my own bio-kid.

Four, though it's immature I love rubbing my child-free lifestyle (complete with luxury vacations, shopping for expensive jewelery/shoes/perfumes, great body, ability to do what I want when I want, sleeping in, having a beautiful home) in his female friend's fat face and watching her boil with rage and envy.

gladtheyrenotmine's picture

Submitted by gladtheyrenotmine on Mon, 03/05/2012 - 2:29pm

So glad to see I'm not the only one whose had to deal with this question. I thought I wanted kids at one point in life, but after being with DW for 7 years now, seeing how she deals with her kids, I've had my mind changed.

While she loves her kids undoubtely and does everything she can for them, I feel like she goes WAY overboard, babying them and doing everything for them. They are 11 and 13, yet she still picks up after them, pours them a glass of whatever drink requested while they stand idly by and watch, doesn't enforce any semblance of manners or courtesy. In short, I know there is NO way I could ever expect her to change her standards because the two of us had a kid together.

Yet for some reason, lately I just keep thinking about how I'm at a stage in my life where I would like to have my OWN family. If I'm truly going to stay with this woman, I want something of my OWN, not just her shitty little bratty ass kids. She's about to turn 38, and I think her time may be up. I can't blame her either. I think maybe the two of us having kids together just wasn't meant to be. Unfortunately this hasn't completely wiped out my desire to have one of my own. I'm only 30 and don't have kids. Am I shortchanging myself??