that you had to do SDs laundry?????

Did you just stand there and laugh your ass off at him?

Because that would have been MY REACTION!!! Did you ever see the old Tom Hanks movie "Money Pit" (with Shelley Long) when the bath tub falls through the floor, and he laughs so hard he just can't stop himself???? THAT'S how hard I would have laughed at him...because I know he just had to be kidding!

This is SD17, right? The horrible one? The one who screwed you out of getting that job, purposely broke your Grandmother's teapot, had sex on your living room couch, and DEMANDS $2000 for her prom, yet is a C student....and is basically making your life a living hell?

Am I missing something here?

I'd scream, too Ferretmom. I'd scream right at DH, "I'M SO OVER YOU IT'S NOT EVEN FUNNY!"

I'm so sorry he treats you this way.

"Of course things worked out nicely for Carol Brady...she had a live-in maid and Mike's first wife was DEAD!"

clean that room and do laundry. Let him do it! THen maybe he will get on SD to do it cus he doesnt want to do it. I do laundry for my SD, because she is 8..but she has to put away her laundry and she has to clean her room. PERIOD. Im a not a maid...unless someone wants to pay me.

Also.......I love 5teens little quote..about carol brady!!!!!!!!! SO TRUE!

No way whatsoever!! I think laughing at him on this is a great idea! Whatever you do do not give in on this!!!!

"A lie told often enough becomes the truth." - Vladimir Lenin

Absolutely NOT. If he wants it done - let him do it , i didn't read that ANYONE helped you clean anything. Is he trying to raise a completely helpless adult? A parents job is to teach their child - your H is completely failing at his job

doing ss 16 laundry for about 3 months now and he hasn't done it so he has been wearing dirty clothes for that long.My dh told me not to do it because he is old enough now.Or when he goes to his bm house she can do it she is his mother {doesnt act like one]but anyways.He used to have like 4 loads just for him so it would take me like 2 days to do everyones laundry.I have given myself this new rule that if they are old enough to know how to work a washing machine they can do their own laundry.Its all apart of becoming an adult.

How old is SD? I don't care if she is a SD or a BD, she can do her own laundry. Or at least put them in the washer in an attempt to "try". And DH needs to get his head out of the clouds...I can't believe that he thinks you are Mary "flippin" Poppins, and you should be cleaning everything. Ughhh...I would scream too. First of all - SD needs to do her own stuff. My SD8 when she was 6 acted like she couldn't pick up anything over the size of a dust bunny...but I changed that. Now she has to let us know when her laundry pile is full, and then when the washer is empty I have her load it up. I give her the detergent, and have her put it in there and turn the washer on. When it is time for the clothes to get dried, she puts them in the dryer. I wasn't about to let her have me be a little merry maid and I urge you to do the same...There is a limit to what we mothers can take, and I think if a mom is working or not and if the kids is a step or not - kids need to be held responsible for their filthiness.

And he has DOWN SYNDROME.

Get that Disneyland/ Guilt-parenting Parents????

He's MENTALLY CHALLENGED!!!! And even HE is perfectly
CAPABLE of learning how a washing machine and dryer work!

So what's your "Delicate Snowflakes'" excuse?
Exactly. They don't have one.

"Of course things worked out nicely for Carol Brady...she had a live-in maid and Mike's first wife was DEAD!"

It would be a snowball's day you know where before DH would tell me to do any laundry for SD. My SD does her own. It may not be as often as I would like, but she does it. Now what gets me is when SD does about 12 pairs of shoes in one load and places them all on top of my washer and dryer to dry. Then she leaves them there for days making it hard for me to do ours.

As far as picking up her stuff. If she leaves bowls, glasses etc in places I tell DH to pick them up. He then tells SD to pick up. It works for me. My DH is like an ostrich with his head in the sand checking out ant farms. Once I point something out though, he normally deals with it.

"OCD sucks"
Habit and routine have an unbelievable power to destroy.
--Henri de Lubac

Harleygal-I get that too -SS16 leaves a trail of dishes behind him wherever he goes-used to make my blood boil-HOWEVER-now I just smile sweetly and say to DH-

DH, I am filling the dishwasher -could you please go downstairs and in Zippy's room and get the dishes that are in there-thank-you.

SOMETIMES he will even ask SS16 to bring his dishes to the dishwasher!

Step Parenting – you might need to step back before you step in something!

If he is so concerned about HIS daughter's room and the smell maybe HE should go in there in clean it. OMG FM I can't believe you didn't start laughing in his face. My own son who has, ADD, Tourette's and some other neurological problems started doing his own laundry at the age of 8. I hope you did not lift a finger. If she is so lazy that she can't wash her own clothes then she can run around in funky smelling nasty clothes - that is HER problem. That is just nasty. I wouldn't touch her stuff with a 10 foot pole. Oh yeah and I forgot about the teapot too. That girl should be cleaning her room, washing her clothes, and doing chores around the house as a member of a FAMILY. Has your DH recovered from the ass-whipping you gave him yet????

How old is your sd??? This is unbelievable behavior on her part AND your husbands. I think you and your husband need to sit down and discuss what is reasonable behavior for your sd and what chores need to be HERS so that this doesn't keep happening. Once the two of you decide you should ALL sit down and let her know. Don't do it in a way like you are accusing her of being lazy and rude (even though she is!), just tell her that now that she is whatever age, it's time for her to take on some responsibilities. She may protest but it'll be up to her to do her chores if she wants clean clothes and a bed that doesn't SMELL!

"To Thine Own Self Be True" William Shakesphere

You know I get sick of H pushing me around...and it has improved a little over the last few weeks...something he even admitted this afternoon, as we were watching a couple fight it out on Dr. Phil.

But-FM-why don't you take a little vacation and go visit your son? You've got good skills-maybe a couple of weeks away from those two would open you up to how good your life could actually be, and open theirs (at least your H's) to how good he's got it with you. NO OTHER WOMAN on planet earth would put up with this crap!

I can see your point and TOTALLY agree with you.

Problem is for me, she would not have the option or opportunity to slack to that level. First off, DH is a white glove cleaner. My kids rooms are spotless and done by them. We do the laundry and they are responsible for putting their OWN clothing away nice and neatly and in the proper places.

Now I know that she is 19 and all, BUT she would not occupy or funk up any space in my home because of laziness. She would clean it, keep it clean or find somewhere else to live at 19. She is no longer a minor and her behavior reeks of slothfulness.

She should have to do laundry no less than weekly AND when she allows it to pile like that, my washer and dryer would be off limits. She should go to the laundromat at her expense. I think if you inconvenienced her, she would probably make more of an effort.

I am still amazed at DHs gall to tell you to clean it!!! Puhleeze. Wouldn't do it if she were 13, definitely not doing it when she is 19. Needs to learn what it is like to be responsible for something, hell anything.

People who get on HIGH Horses will find the fall to be painful. ~ME :->