Is it me or is SD27 trying to get me to flip out
My SD27, who I was the primary caregiver from age 7 to 19, is on a mission to make me flip out. She comes to town and takes all of the stuff off my kitchen counters and puts them back in "better more organized" places. She also rearranges my silverware and junk drawer. I quietly put it all back when she is not around and now she has taken to crying to my DH about how mean I am and never appreciate her and the I should be grateful the kitchen "was finally clean". I want to smack her so f***ing bad. SD also took all my pots and pans out of the cabinet and left them on the floor. She later told her "Daddeeee" that I needed to help out more around the house. WTF. This is my house that DH and I bought together 15 years ago. This is not Daddeee's house, this is our house.
I think I need to disengage from her but I was mom for a long time to her and it is hard. Her POS BM didn't do anything for her or my SS26 and SS28. BM just had a bunch more kids and oh-welled my SD and SSs. I feel guilty that I want to give up but she is really horrible to me. I often mail her little fun care-packages for no reason and make sure birthdays are covered. She is unhappy that her husband moved her 1500 miles away to work. I feel sorry for her hubby. She is mean to him too. SD gives me little to nothing for my b-day and it is usually something weird. Maybe it is petty of me but she makes a point to call my DH to thank him for the packages and he is usually confused and has no idea I even sent anything. I think she has NPD and maybe I am fighting a losing battle.
So how do I disengage from her and handle my DH at the same time. We have been together 20 yrs and he is used to the system, you know, SD being a B!*ch and then me getting my feelings hurt and expected to just take it because she is the little princess who is just trying to make it and is all in need. Barf SD and her hubby make way more $ than we do!
She is still mad that we have
She is still mad that we have been together for 20 yrs and married for 18. She is really pissed because we have a D and she was the only girl until then. She acts all happy but really resents me for daring to have my own child and it was a girl. Her pig BM has 5 boys total so she thinks that she is the princess in all the families. I will be surprised if her marriage lasts another year as her husband is sick of her shit too. Plus she learned from her BM that faithfulness is not a requirement of marriage. The more I think about it the madder I get that I have tried to make it work for so long.
I truly think she has NPD. I
I truly think she has NPD. I can answer absolutely yes to all the symptoms. I also think she feels like she in entitled to do or say whatever she wants because she is "just being honest" and we taught her to be honest. I have been slowly talking about NPD to DH and think he might be opening his eyes finally.
She was visiting without her
She was visiting without her hubby while he traveled for work. I have tried talking to her but she runs to daddee and makes up a lie about how I yelled at her etc. We didn't raise her to be so rude. She acts like her BM even though she used to thank me for keeping her safe from all that mess.
>>THIS<<
>>THIS<<
I'm sorry you are dealing
I'm sorry you are dealing with this. She is much too old to be acting this way.
Next time she says "I'm just
Next time she says "I'm just being honest" let her have it with both barrels.
Tell you that you know she will appreciate your being honest. And that you honestly hate her guts and wish her to go away and never darken your doorstep again. }:)
So what if she runs to daaadeee saying that you were mean. What is he going to do to you - ground you? You are an adult woman you should not have to worry about getting "in trouble" with your DH.
^^^Exactly! So she tells
^^^Exactly! So she tells daddy you yelled at her? Then YELL at her! Why are you afraid to confront her?
The TRYING-to-talk-with-her time is way over.
dup
dup
We need to have a master
We need to have a master thread to brainstorm how to beat these bitches at their own game. How to tell them to fuck off with a smile. My SD has never said one mean thing about me, she is just the master manipulator. It'll be our black book, Im going to start it here in a little while.
I never ever treated my SF
I never ever treated my SF disrespectful, except I am sure I did as a teen but nothing out of the ordinary. I just don't get her coming into my house and acting like I am lucky to be here. I would never go to my parents house and treat my SF like a visitor and if I did my mom would kick my butt. I am glad her next visit will also include lots of other family members so I will have some extra buffers. Funny thing is they are my DHs family and finally see how nasty she is with me and tend to want to buddy around with me instead of SD. I am going to make no arrangements for her and have already informed DH the house will be too full her SD and her hubby. I also commented SD is so awesome and adventurous she could pitch a tent in the back yard. He didn't look amused. DH then asked me to get her a good deal on a hotel. After a brief moment of silence I said no flipping way was I wasting my time finding a good deal for her, she never appreciates anything or says thanks me so why should I spend my time catering to her. He seemed shocked and tried to pull the ittdy biddy princes crap, I shut that down and said she could do it herself or he could do it for her, I frankly didn't care. He tried to stroke my ego and say he knows how much I love finding a good deal and how good at it I am. Silence and then I said it... If SD wasn't such a bitch I would be more than happy to find a good deal or figure out how to squeeze her in the house.
It's like the more I think about all the stuff I am supposed to just ignore her doing and saying the more I realize how vile she is. I am committing to spending my time on someone who cares and no longer SD. I think the mommy in me has trouble letting her go. At least my SSs are rude and asses to everyone equally not just me. I don't mind them as much because they rarely say anything awful to me anymore and it is greatly out wayed by the nice-ish things they do and say.