Yep, She Exploded Did You All See the Cloud of Smoke Going Up?
Yep, Twit was on the explosion ramp as I figured by Christmas, and IMHO she just finished. She is going to have a whole lot of splaning to do if she hasn't done it already.
Told you all about the card and the pot and pan shower, which neither DH and I have any interest in. So, she has called several times. Sigh, we always get a land line because it is easier for me to hear on; and it is easy to track that number, which she has done. Before she found it she was just leaving messages and text messages on our cell phone.
Well, no one is bothering until today. She called, went to answering machine but we could hear the message....blubbering Twit, upset, crying, evidently her hubby is working today. This is typical because Twit doesn't like being with herself.
DH picked up the call and she went into a tirade at him screaming that no one cared for her threatening things on herself as she has done before. DH tried to calm her down but failed so he looked at me and told me to call the police in her area on the cell. She could her him say that to me. Cells are tough for me, but I did get through, and handed it to DH who, with Twit able to hear him on the other line, told them about the circumstances and that he was very concerned about her well being; that we leaved in a state far away and couldn't do anything for her. She was screaming hysterically at him while he was doing this and I am certain they heard her too!
I took the cell and was able to give them all the information about her address, phone etc.; as well as ours. DH was still on phone with her until she slammed it down.
One great thing is that a lot of her rant recorded on the answering machine so there is proof.
DH is quite upset right now, not because he believes she is going to do anything to herself, but it is the same ole same ole from her. She needs help, he said, and more than just what she is taking. But he is calming down.
She is going to have to do some splaining very shortly when they come out. This is not the first time they have been called out to her house by us. She pulled that old chestnut a few years back. But this time the 911 operator could hear her hysteria, threats etc. over the cell.
At this point it is all out
At this point it is all out of our hands. I asked DH if he was going to call the police later to see what happened; he didn't respond at first but said that if anything important happens he figures we will hear from Twit's hubby.
I must say, I have never heard her that distraught before.
Can she be forced to go in for a psych exam, or perhaps even taken to a hospital? I hope so because maybe she can get help she desperately needs
Have to explain to me what a
Have to explain to me what a 51/50 is.
They can hold her
They can hold her 'involuntarily too. But can you imagine anyone actually helping her?
Sandye - No I don't believe
Sandye - No I don't believe any one can help Twit....she doesn't believe or think anything is wrong with her BUT she knows it because she is sneaky about the evil she does. She knows,but she doesn't care and then when the sh*t hits the fan she cries and blubbers and starts playing the victim. Everyone is attacking HER and she did NOTHING to deserve it, in her mind.
It is interesting that when things aren't going the way she wants them to, she starts getting mean and nasty towards me or whomever is around. Call her on it and she will, quite innocently, tell you she doesn't know what you are talking about. She knows. It is a thing she has done probably all her life and I would imagine that to some of her family members, like DH, it disarms him, which is what she intends.
As my best friend said, SDM, don't be alone with her, she is not safe for you regardless of what you husband says. DH use to tell me that Twit would never hurt anyone and he should know. I think that for years he denied what was really going on. She would come up with the most outrageous lies, things that didn't make sense, and if questioned about what she meant would start telling me that she didn't know what I was talking about! First couple of times she did this I was confused by what was going on, which is what she wanted. But I caught on and nailed her when she told me that again telling her directly that she darn well knew what I was talking about and I wouldn't stand for it. Natch she started crying and DH consoled her but even as she was blubbering, she was casting mean looks at me letting me know she wasn't finished with me.
A lot of her problem with me is that I don't buckle under her craziness, I haven't given in....well moving is giving in but it was the right thing to do.
SDM, You did not give up by
SDM, You did not give up by moving away - you were merely removing yourself from an evil vortex. Instead you did what you had to so that you, DH and your marriage survived. Imagine someone who lived in your neighborhood who created as much stress, heartache and potential danger as Twit did, you would have still left to protect yourself. It's not giving up - it's necessity.
Oh wow! Maybe this time
Oh wow!
Maybe this time she's learn her lesson. Don't cry wolf.
Will the police call DH back with info on their 'welfare check'?
I didn't ask about that. But
I didn't ask about that. But I am certain, regardless of what DH says right now, he will call them later and check on things.
Interesting how in her ravings she was crying about how she needs us and misses us and wants us to come back. What balderdash she didn't know who the h*ll we were unless she wanted something or needed something and would get mad if she didn't get what she wanted.
I am actually exhausted after that fiasco. That drama is very tiring.
The 50/51 mentioned above is
The 50/51 mentioned above is an involuntary psychiatric hold.
After everything the dispatcher heard SD from her end of the line they may send her for a psych evaluation . May might be such a bad thing to occur.
No, there is nothing her father or you can do. Whether you both were in close locale or clear away across the country. You've already moved to escape her which is unfortunate that you were forced to but so much better for you in the long run.
I do have some sadness for Twit that she is mentally melting down, but realistically there is truly nothing neither Dad nor you can do and what you did do was the correct thing. Sometimes people have to be forced to get the true type of help they need. Twit needs help neither of you are able to professionally provide her... so you did help her in the only real way you could. You reported her to the proper authorities and all you can do is let them decide what to do with her.
I'm so sorry she puts all this stress on you and Dad. A no contact order may be a very good thing to do. Her craziness can not be allowed to destroy your health and well being.
I found myself crying as I
I found myself crying as I cleaned up lunch dishes. DH asked what was wrong and I told him I just could not go through any more of that; it has to end.
He made coffee and we talked about what to do. He says that he is going to contact both Twit and her husband and tell them that we are cutting off all contact with them, that dealing with her has wrecked my health and his as well and, well, enough is enough. About her calls he is going to make it clear to Twit's hubby that if she continues as she has done, he is going to file a harassment report with the police. In fact, DH said he is going to talk to someone down at the police office on Monday to see what we can do about things.
While he loves her, he too is upset that she drove us out of a beautiful house in an area we loved with her looniness.
The only reason Twit wants us close to her is so that she can come pick our bones if something happens to either one of us, ghoul that she is. Keep an eye on us for her own benefit. Shiver....I wouldn't want to depend on her as I go further into old age, I have seen how she treats her dogs, and she professes to love them.
Sigh, Step....I admit I am
Sigh, Step....I admit I am ignorant about them there things. Basically because I have a hard time hearing on them. That is one reason I get a land line. DH handles the cell....he's older but he is more knowledgeable on that then me.
Wow, what a screwed up mess
Wow, what a screwed up mess she is. So sorry you still have to deal with her from afar.
In July, we had to call the cops to go to SD's house because she was having a major meltdown fit and threatening to kill herself because daddy wasn't in town to take care of whatever crisis had arisen that day. The cops went to her place and found that she was just fine. If she wasn't, then going in to the psych hospital would have been a good thing anyway. Maybe Twit will get the help she needs.
DH suggested over dinner
DH suggested over dinner tonight that we go up to Vegas for a few days next week. It's a drive, but he wants to get away for a few days. We have a neighbor in this community that takes care of dogs in her home so he is going to talk to her.
You are right...this may be just what she needs....help. Then perhaps her Drunkie can get the help he needs rather than Momma Twit always sticking her nose in his treatment.
I bet that Momma Twit had Drunkie sign a consent form for her to get info. Thus if they start to get close to the truth about things you can bet she stops Drunkie's treatment. She is the one hiding that wants no one to know what she really is and what really goes on. Remember, in her mind she, and her family are PERFECT and all the rest of us are fouled up.
We all knew it was coming,
We all knew it was coming, SDM. She had a minor meltdown before Christmas, it didn't work so she may have thought she should up the drama. While I really believe she has some degree of insanity, I also think she has relied on this kind of drama all of her life to get what she wants. This time she may have bit off more than she can chew.
It is so good that your DH is placing your health and welfare as a priority, and is willing to take action to ensure you are not stressed. I sincerely hope you are right about possible intervention by the authorities for Drunkie's treatment.
So sorry to hear you are
So sorry to hear you are still dealing with stress from twit via long distance. I knew it was your posting just from the heading.
Please do whatever you need to do to cut her out of your life. If she ever gets help then perhaps she can come back slowly.
Your DD can tell you how to block her calls. You can also block her from calling your land line. Contact your provider or go online to your account. Usually you can put the block on for three months at a time. If necessary get the no contact order from the police. If any news needs to reach you from or about her then it can come thru her husband or sister.
Protect your health and peace.
Best always.
When I saw the words "Yep she
When I saw the words "Yep she exploded .." I immediately knew that this was going to be a post about Twit.
Yes, it's sad that Twit is so broken - but unfortunately there is absolutely nothing that you or your DH can do to fix her or Drunkie. You just have to protect yourselves.
You and I are approximately the same age. We know that we do not have decades and decades and decades of life left. It really is important to live each day that we do have and to enjoy it to the fullest. If that means eliminating close but toxic relatives - well that's what one has to do.
One of my dearest BFFs is 20 years older than I am - which puts her in her 90s. I've watched her go from a vibrant older woman who traveled to Europe and many other places quite frequently to now someone who is on oxygen and who get exhausted by a lunch outing - although she still loves our lunch dates. Her mind is sharp as a tack - but the body is failing.
I've had to face that my days of walking for miles and miles to sight see are now quite limited due to a recent mobility issue with a dead nerve in one leg. I've always taken it for granted that I could walk (not run) 6-8 miles.
I will accept that my body is declining - but I will not accept toxic people who diminish the rest of my life.
You know you have my very best wishes for your happy ever after.
Nota ... what an insightful,
Nota ... what an insightful, and truthful, post.
Disengagement works if people WORK at it. It's takes a lot of effort to get toxic people out of your life and more importantly, your head space.
Getting them out of your head space is the harder part. It's easy to physically avoid people. But to truly disengage you have to be mentally able to dismiss them.
Many people can't seem to do that, thus they are doomed to feel the effects of the toxicity.
In the meantime, the clock keeps ticking. Every minute's breath or energy wasted on useless people is your own life being wasted.
Notasm, Such a good point. I
Notasm, Such a good point. I had not thought of this much and it is really something to ponder. We've all known people, myself included, who have trudged on for decades. never giving up on trying win a toxic person over or trying to resolve a toxic situation - only to pass on before their time. One of the most popular sayings is, "Never give up." If I could regain all of the years I've wasted on this useless exercise I'd live to be 150. I hate the thought of one day not being able to be as active as I am now. As cruel as aging sometimes is, it is something I must eventually deal with.
I have 20 years at the most to make hay while the sun shines. I'm making a New Years resolution to not waste another moment on dealing with or even thinking of toxic people.
For me, SD is one of the people on my toxic list, but sometimes I wonder if DH will ever try to reconnect with his daughter. I also wonder if it ever occurs to her that he only has so many years left until she can no longer take advantage of the opportunity. But then, that's one thing toxic people like Twit have in common: It's all about them.
Hi Notastepmom - I know there
Hi Notastepmom - I know there is nothing that I or DH can do to fix Twit. I doubt that anyone can fix her. And the truth is I don't care if she can be fixed or not. That concerns me a tad because I never wish ill on anyone or like to see people hurt, but, well, I guess the word would be I am calloused towards her and her antics.
I am so impressed with your
I am so impressed with your DH! Having the presence of mind to have you call the police while dealing with that nutter was terrific.
I think today's episode was a game changer for you. Twit now knows that her dad will indeed pull the big red handle if she goes ballistic on you. Brighter days are surely ahead for you!
Enjoy yourselves in Vegas!
Haven't heard anything about
Haven't heard anything about anything yet. I would imagine DH will check with the police today. I bet that Twit's hubby is teed off at us because now he has to handle things and face what has been going on. He has been hiding in his man cave for years.
OMGosh! This woman needs to
OMGosh! This woman needs to be put in a straight jacket and lots of help from someone besides family. Unless she recognizes her own problems there is no helping her. "God Helps Those That Help Themselves".
Sorry for all the turmoil and drama.
You're a better person than I
You're a better person than I am. I would have not called the cops. Just a simple "click."
drama queen - DH should learn
drama queen - DH should learn to ignore the Twit lol
Glad I finally got a Twit update hehehehe, I'm taking notes like crazy cause this will be my future....
I hope you are feeling better SDM sending you a big bear hug
Gawd Acratopotes, I hope no
Gawd Acratopotes, I hope no one has to deal with something like the Twit. In all my years I have never encountered anything like her.
As I told DH, I would not put up with the things Twit does and how she acts towards me if she were just an acquaintance, why should I put up with them just because she is his daughter. At first he got all bristly because I said that, but when he thought about it a minute, he could see my side.
Well, here it is Monday and
Well, here it is Monday and DH hasn't called either the Twit's police station for an update or called to check on what is going on with Twit. DH says no new is good news....whatever that means.
Must admit I am curious but not my business and whatever happens with her I truly don't care. She was probably as calm as a cucumber when they showed up. She has this strange ability to morph back to pretending to be normal because she hides what she is through years and years of practice. The old, looking at you straight in the eyes and saying she doesn't know what you are talking about.
DH will call in his own time I am sure. He said he had me call the authorities because one is never sure when self harm is threatened, if it is a real threat or not.
I believe the fact he is waiting is that he doesn't want to get drawn back into crazy land again.
Twit is simply trying to
Twit is simply trying to manipulate DH with emotional black mail.....
next time DH asks you to call the cops, don't even waste a call on that, pretend to do so... really how many more times will he fall for this, he should learn to tell her over the phone... fine if you want to do that then go ahead, I will decide if I will attend your funeral or not.... harsh I know but then she will realize that is not working anymore...
You are assuming that Twit
You are assuming that Twit wants and thinks she needs treatment. Remember, in Twit's mind she is PERFECT it is the rest of us peons that have the problems. She can be mean about something and if called on it starts her victimization routine about how terrible you are to say such to her. Even though she was the one that got out of line she always sees herself at the victim....how DARE any one say such things to her. This went on for the past 5 years and it was amazing at how many people bought her BS. After the first few times of this when I was caught off guard not understanding what was going on, I caught on and called her out on it. I think that might have been one of her problems with me, that I didn't let her run rough shod all over me, I stood u to her BS.
But I will say that when she first started on me I was confused because I didn't comprehend why she was doing or saying those things.
Or when she told me, shortly after we moved down there, that she REQUIRES unconditional love. That was strange but in a way a warning.
Well, DH hasn't called to
Well, DH hasn't called to inquire about Twit and we have heard nothing on the cell (we are currently in Vegas). I haven't brought her up though he has once or twice. I get the impression he is concerned BUT..
Heading back home tomorrow. Will see what happens when he gets home.
I hope that they did make her go in for an evaluation and I hope they keep her longer, as in lock her up. Either way I can tell you she is hoping mad, yes mad as is foaming at the mouth, at me for doing that. Twit being what she is is generally blames me for anything and everything even when her Father was the one that did it.
But as long as I am far, far away I give a ratz butt what she thinks one way or the other. It was great relaxing here knowing that I was far out of her reach. We have only been out west a few months but I sure can get use to being away from crazy.
Well, gonna go back down and see how DH is doing at black jack. For me it is slots and I took a break for a bit.
I didn't know your backstory
I didn't know your backstory as I've not been on ST in the longest time, but I gather this is a long term problem and you've had to move to get away from the Twit.
I have suffered from serious mental health problems myself, in the past, but it doesn't give you carte blanche to make everyone else's life a misery. I would suggest that the Twit is not your husband's responsibility and certainly not yours, if anyone's she is her own husband's - but once we are adults, we are all responsible for ourselves - and she needs to get help.
If she chooses not to, it is not up to your DH to pick up the pieces nor to make himself or you ill trying to support her. Please try to mentally let go and look to your own health and peace of mind.
I am sorry that you and DH
I am sorry that you and DH continue to have to deal with her psycho crap. You are doing the right thing by making a call for a well check by her local police. Eventually they will get her into the system and get her some help.