This is going to be long and I apologize, but I am so upset and just need to get advice and opinions for my sanity. My SD just turned 11 and in the last 6 months has not enjoyed going to visit her mom. She started complaining about the house being filthy and smelling like pee, that they have to stay inside all weekend and are not allowed to go outside, and that her mom leaves for work all day and leaves her and her sisters, age 14 and 6, and her friends children there all day. Her friends children are 5 years old and younger and there are 4 of them. She hated it. We also have battled head lice over the summer and SD did not like going over there because she hated to get them. When she was there a week once she came home and told me that her head has been itching the whole time and it was driving her crazy, so I looked and she had a head full. We stopped counting after 100 bugs, and it took me all night cleaning and combing out her hair. Well she got to where she would call when she was at her moms and want her dad to come and get her. He would speak to her mother and go and get her. So, SD called her mom about 3 weeks ago and told her that she wanted to only come over every third weekend. Her mom got upset, and naturally so, but she agreed.

So on the first visit, which was this past weekend, SD came home and I immediately take her to the bathroom to was her hair. Well, I noticed her eye was swollen and black with red patches all around it, then I noticed her neck, it had a long burn looking mark on it and was black around that. I asked her what in the world happened to her and she looked at me and said that it was a long story. Well I told her that I thought that was a story that her dad needed to hear. When I finished she asked if she could just talk to me at first and I told her sure. We sat down and she started to cry and I just held her for a while until she calmed down, she said that she was scared to say anything because her mom told her that she would get into trouble and could even go to jail, meaning the SD. I assured her that she was only 11 and that she would not go to jail. So sobbing she told me that she asked her mom for her birthday money and her mom told her that she didn't have it, SD said she accused her mom of spending it, which she has a record of, Her mom said that she didn't, and SD said that she called her a liar. She said that her mom started to scream at her for being a smart mouth and then started to slap her. SD said that she then got a belt and started to hit her everywhere. SD said she tried to push her away from her and that is when her mom punched her in the eye. SD said that it seemed like it was never going to end. She told her mom that she wanted to call her dad to come and get her, her mom said no and wouldn't let her. She them told her mom that she would run away, and she went for the door, but her mom dragged her to a bedroom and locked her in it. She said that she was so mad at that point and that she kicked the door until it broke, her mom was right there and that she started hitting her again and that SD kicked her mom hard in the leg. She said that she then told SD that she was going to call the police and have her arrested for abuse and tell the police that SD was the one that jumped on her and that she would go to jail. SD got scared and just let her lock her in the room. She said she was laying on the bed crying and she heard her mom talking to a friend and telling them lies, saying that she started it and that her mom was just protecting herself.

SD said that when her mom came back in the room hours later, that her mom was still mad and didn't hit her again, but told her that she wished she was never born and that her dad didn't even want her because he wanted her to have an abortion. She told SD that she was bi-polar and needed to be put on med. That SD was so mentally ill that she really needed to be locked away in a crazy house. That she was just a stupid kid and a waste of space. SD said that she went on and on telling her horrible things. She then made her apologize for making a bruise on her leg and SD said that she did tell her that she was sorry for it.

Now this all happened Saturday, SD said that it was in the daytime, and it continued into the night. She even made SD sleep on the floor because she told her that she was the one bringing lice into her house. Bio mom didn't bring her home until 8pm on Sunday. We take her to her moms and her mom brings her home, because we live an hour away. Bio mom is suppose to have her home by 6pm, so she was 2 hours late. DH even called BM when she wasn't here and never did she mention anything about what went on, acted like they were just having so much fun that they forgot the time.

Well, I called the police that night and had them come out and make a report on her bruises. She had the eye and neck that I mentioned, plus bruises all along her one side and one bruise that was the size of a baseball and dark purple, scratches and marks all over her wrist and arms, her knee was bruised and she has a belt mark on the front of her leg. It is so big and black that I can tell you the exact width of the belt. When the police seen all the bruises he said that first thing in the morning I should call DHS. That is then when SD started to tell the policeman that her mom also smoked pot and he asked her did she do it in front of you and she told him yes. We had never heard that before, so I was taken aback. I called DHS and made a report and now we are waiting to hear from them.

Again sorry this is long, but I am just floored and out of my element on this. What can be done to BM? Has anyone every experienced this before? I am worried how SD is going to do with this down the road and how it is going to affect her. We have her talking to a counselor at school for now and will be finding one for her, because I am worried about her even thinking of believing anything that her mother said to her that day. I swear this woman should never have had children. And I wish I could give her a taste of what my SD felt on that day, it almost makes me angry that I can't do it.