Calm before the storm?
Media silence for the last week of school! I sit and wonder if she is even going to get her credits...DH doesn't seem to care. I'm praying he doesn't try to convince HHB to come over to our house for any period of time this summer! I'm just waiting for the trouble...for the blow up fight with BM or SF...and then HHB will suddenly want to hang out over here! Oh hell no! No more using my home to escape the bullsh*t she creates! IF DH comes to me and says, "Oh, HHB will be staying with us for a couple of weeks" my immediate response will be, "Oh, and you have time off from work scheduled? Because, if you don't, she really has no business being here!" Visits with DH are visits with DH...period! That is my stance from now on! I don't care if she is 16 and "can take care of herself"...she has a bad attitude, has no respect for me or my home, and she has a history and can't be trusted! I'm not playing babysitter to a 16-year-old because she got in trouble or is not getting along with the adults at her home! SHE made the decision to move back when she got in trouble here. SHE can sleep in the bed she has made for herself! DH wants to see his daughter, that is fine. But seeing his daughter will NOT mean he goes to work leaving her lazy arse on my couch!
We SM's sit and wait to see what happens with the summer! Summer should be a time for fun...not for dread! Thanks to the step-spawn, we have to sit and wonder what hell the summer will bring!
Exactly! I know HHB has told
Exactly! I know HHB has told all kinds of lies about me. And she can't be trusted home alone, because she doesn't think rules apply to her! Not to mention, the sneaking out...I'm not dealing with any more 2 a.m. phone calls from cops...or worse!
That is exactly what BM AND
That is exactly what BM AND HHB have been doing the last few years! HHB got in trouble for smoking pot beginning of 8th grade. BM shipped her to us without telling us what she was in trouble for...just said, "I can't handle her any more!" By the end of the semester, BM and HHB were both begging for HHB to move back with BM...so she did. That is when BM finally got around to telling DH what really happened! With 2 weeks left in that school year, BM sends HHB back to us again...or HHB wanted to run to our house...I still don't know which it was. HHB got caught skipping school to smoke pot. So back to us she was shipped. Did all of 9th grade with us. During the first semester of 10th grade, the bugging to move back to BM's started again! I was starting to not put up with the crap any more, and I was making sure DH did something about it (as he didn't do jack with ANY of the trouble until then). DH gets call first couple of days of winter break that HHB snuck out and got picked up by cops on a curfew violation. All her electronics were taken away, and DH let me give her a piece of my mind, as well as giving her a piece of his. She went to BM's for Christmas, and BM calls DH that HHB is not coming back, and saying all we do is yell at her and come down on her! No, she got in trouble and got grounded! HHB hasn't been for a visit except one to pick up clothing since...it's been 5 months.
Bad thing is after she left, I told DH, "You know, she has been sneaking out for a while now...often!" He says, "Yeah, I know. I've heard her. I've heard the dogs. I just didn't want to wake everyone up in the middle of the night dealing with it!" REALLY? So you do NOTHING? I was already awake because I'm a light sleeper...he should have known that!
I know if she came to visit, it would be just to sneak out with the pot heads she hung out with here...and yes, she was still smoking while here. There were many, many times she would come home eyes all glazed claiming she was tired. No, honey...you were stoned! How could DH not smell it? Well, HHB did get caught with an e-cig/vapor stick at one point. I know this is the new thing, because you get the THC, and not the smell. I'm pretty certain that is how she was doing most of it.
I pray for your continued
I pray for your continued radio silence! DH won't do anything to set boundaries when HHB is there, and there's no way in hell YOU should have to! But what choice do we have when skids start wrecking our home life, our "normal," our only place for peace and quiet? It gives us no choice but to lay down the law, 1) Because the skids deserve it and 2) because DH won't do it and 3) because it's our HOME!
Stay strong and don't let her come waltzing back when the other step, the SF, gets sick of her shit over there!
~ Moon
im hoping we see very little
im hoping we see very little of SD this summer.
she has a job apparently (prob wont last more than a few weeks, she'll either be bored or get fired).
she still really isnt speaking to my fiance. i havent seen her ugly face in a month now.
she starts HS this fall. she is not going to do well.