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That didn't last long...

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

DH gave SD14 back her tablet last night...not even a full week of punishment. AND word around is that she has a boyfriend who lives very close by, though she denies it (that would explain the dog going crazy that night, which has happened at least twice again since). When DH told SD14 who told him, her response was to not trust anything those girls said, because they are total liars. Really? You are going to play that card? Though I don't totally trust the girls who told DH about the boyfriend, I also don't trust SD14. There have also been multiple nights so far where the dog has been barking for apparently no reason, and DH didn't even bother to go see what was up. I've stopped getting up to check...figure if he isn't concerned, I'm just going to let what happens happen. With her history of sneaking out and such, I can't understand why DH doesn't check up on things when the dog barks, especially with the recent revelation that there may be a boy within walking distance that SD14 is involved with. I know she has to be involved with someone...when I walk out to the living room when she is at home, she is talking on the phone with someone, and it sure does sound like she is talking to a guy (ladies, you know what I mean...we've all been there...that different way we talk and giggle when we are talking to a guy we are interested in, especially when we were younger).

I've also noticed that when she leaves the house for color guard, she is dressing a bit different...in a manner I know DH would not approve of if he saw it! She folds over the tops of her running shorts to make them shorter, ties her shirt up so that it shows her mid-drift. I'm telling you, now that this child is in high school, this is going to mean trouble! I can't understand why DH is so trusting, especially with as many lies she keeps getting caught in! I can promise you that stupid chat program is still on her tablet!

misSTEP's picture

I know that you want to be disengaged from this mess but at least discuss with your DH about taking her to the doctor and getting her on a BC shot.

I say shot because it is way too easy for these kids to forget to take the pill or "forget" when they think they are mature enough that they actually WANT a baby.

I speak from experience, my DH was NCP but my SD started doing that type of stuff when she was 14 and ended up pregnant and a single mom by age 16. My DH was also paying for half the cost of the BC pill that BM had her placed on (as well as the STD testing that BM insisted on when she found out she was having sex at age 15).

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

Thanks for the advice, but that certainly isn't going to happen! He is of the "just don't have sex" school of thought. He thinks any kind of birth control is like giving them a free ticket to have sex...and is completely blind to the fact that teens WILL have sex when they want to regardless of what we parents say. My oldest is 22, and I know she was having sex starting at 16, but DH stayed in denial the whole time. I have brought up the fact that SD14's behavior when it comes to boys, not to mention all the times BM has let SD14 go over to boyfriends' houses without personally verifying that parents were there and that the kids would be watched like hawks, concerns me. SD14 is very flirtatious! My son's friends come over, and she tries to make her presence known or tries to get involved with what they are doing (which totally annoys my son, and is a big part of the reason he has spent most of the summer at his friends' houses instead of them coming here). When I picked her up today, she pointed out this one boy that was supposedly a friend of hers...this kid is 16-17 easy! Why is he talking or hanging out with a 14 year old?

This all scares me, because I remember high school all too well! I'm shocked DH isn't more concerned! The flirtatious and gullible freshmen girls are easy target for the junior and senior guys who are total slime-balls...even my son has tried to tell her that not all the guys at the high school are like him and his friends, there are some real a-holes. She just doesn't seem to get it.