I did some thinking...
After reading some of your storys, i might think i have it easy. We share 50/50 with BM which is physical and legal custody.We rotate weekends and have them every other weekdays they go home with BM on our days of the week. BM doesn't call on our weekends with my Skids. Maybe just once and we use the house phone for BM to call my skids, if wheir not home she texts my cell phone we don't talk over text only. MY RULE 
(BM doesn't have my H's cell number). We don't pay CS we also don't help her with clothes, shoes and so on. SD10 and SS6 wear what their father and I buy them at my house and they wear what BM buys them at her house, we don't exchange anything. We don't even help with school clothes, we just buy supplies. We don't pay for health insurance just some of the dential and doctors visits.
Exchange, who ever is expecting Skids picks them up. Don't think we don't help because we can't pay, reason is BM thinks she can do her half on her own, she has, even though she works at Wal-mart, with her money very tight though. My husband is a fulltime doc and I work at night as a fulltime doc's assistant so we make pretty good money, proudly to say after hard efforts.
I have a wonderful relationship with both my skids, all though we can have our bad days at times never nothing my H or i can't handle. My Skids clean their own room and game room, wash their own dish and they help clean table when dinner is over. Sd loves to help me cook dinner and my Ss loves to set the table with out being told. I also have an advantage with my Sd because she really likes my little brother who is 13 so she respects me alot more. I spoil them when good behavior is put in action. We four have iphones SS6 only uses phone at my house Sd10 has hers 24/7 but has password only Sd, my H and I know, BM is not to know pword or iphone is being taken away. BM is really nosie with the text me and SD share so pword was a must.
I live happy and don't go by what BM wants or thinks, we have so much polices reports on our behalf for BM foolish things she's done in the past. Don't let anything slide, and get your Hs to back you up 100% or it won't work. Be strong and put your foot down, block all myspace,facebook,twitter and emails from BM's you don't need to be reading what they say or think about you. Just live your life thinking about your family, freinds and your job and try to take BM out of the picture as much as possible. It's worked for me, had a bad and dramaful life before i put my foot down.
What do you think, do i have it easy?
- Addy2772's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
Happy to say, but the BM
Happy to say, but the BM thinks she is to high class to be living off us. Which I am really proud of her to be independent and not relying on our money.
Lol.. I consider myself as a
Lol.. I consider myself as a postive strong woman no little teenager or kid can over power an adult, only the women that act like teenagers take their teenagers to heart. Ignoring is the best thing.
Yea that is something I am
Yea that is something I am scared about but i'm doing my best to stay postive so everything in my life can see that no one or anything can bring me down. I keep my head up and stuck with what i think is the best for me.
If SD starts acting up which she has, my H puts her strat. My H has my back 100% which makes the whole things alot better
Its true of all teens I
Its true of all teens I think.....I heard this quote a long time ago, it always made me feel better when mine was a teen "Raising a teenager is like nailing Jello to a tree"
My dr. told me to not take
My dr. told me to not take anything that teenagers say or do personally. He said, "look at the teenage years as a temprorary desease, and treat them as if they were patients" :).
True, i don't take anything
True, i don't take anything they say to a personal level. I just brush them aside and ignore them when they are in a bitchy attitude. I pretend they are not there and they see that, so their moods change from wanting attention to them wanting to be part in what we are doing. IT WORKS LADYS!
Uhhhh ohhhh...I just went
Uhhhh ohhhh...I just went back and read this post. Lemee get this straight, this woman works at Walmart and DH is a Dr. You don't allow contact between BM and Skids Dad? BM is not allowed to check her daughter's texts? You then go on to say that you have collected basically 'evidence' against this woman. I really hope that her not receiving child support has nothing to do you holding 'evidence' on her.
I am pretty aware that the courts consider 'child support' for the 'children', the BM has no right to refuse it, so I know no judge made that order. If I were you 1)I'd check out the laws in your state, this could blow up in your face 2)That YOU control communication is also wrong, skids are their kids, any judge will slap your fingers pretty hard on that one.
I do congratulate you on having peace, but it sounds more like a 'control' issue.. Don't get me wrong, I believe that this is a place to vent and I don't judge, but I'd watch my back if I were you, I think what you have is an 'illusion' and it can't last.
Everything I do is court
Everything I do is court ordered it was made like that bacuse of BM's actions.
The reason why Bparent don't
The reason why Bparent don't talk is because BM can't have normal talk with my H she blows up on him so it a court order that she speaks through me. Having a really good lawyer works
I had a really had time when my H and I first moved in with each other, Bm did whatever she wanted she would let herself in my house knocking on my room door! BM once came in my house trying to hit me infront of my Skids police was called. She has sent her brother to my house to try and hit me as well police was called agian, she has sent mother and father. Tryed keeping my Skids from us police was called everytime. Has gone to my work place trying to tell me off polices was called. The list goes on and on. everthing stated on top is a court order. Us not paying CS is whatBM wants, if she would go for it i wouldn't mine because our money is not tight in our behalf.
How did a doctor end up
How did a doctor end up having a baby with a Wal-Mart associate in the first place?
Was it a "Titanic" story? 
I personally have absolutely no BM issues in my life. She seems like a nice lady. The mother of my SD adores the little girl, and her entire life revolves around her. The only problem is that she babies her too much, so the almost-five-year-old girl often behaves like a 2-year-old. But as far as BM getting into our business (my DH's and mine new family) - we have none of that at all. She even allowed SD to have our family portrait (me, my DH, SD, and all 4 of my BK) to be displayed in her (BM's) living room! Both the BM and my DH have only the child's best interests in mind. The only communication between my DH and his ex is strictly business - arranging drop-offs and pick-ups or vacation times, activities, etc. No chit-chat or anything like that. Everybody gets along just fine. My DH pays CS, but it is about half of the full amount he would be paying if they didn't settle. The catch was that in exchange for lower CS payments, DH agreed not to fight for 50/50 custody, so we only have SD about 1/3 of the time (which is more than fine by me! :)). So, I guess, not having any BM issues is not THAT unusual....
Very true. At first it was an
Very true. At first it was an issue but i put a stop to it so BM and I have a great relationship.
It's court order hunny. Don't
It's court order hunny. Don't hate that SM's have the same right as BM do.lol
True but when judge says that
True but when judge says that the only way we can talk is through me, is if she wants it's because she has too